Thursday, November 19, 2015

Ritzy wheelie cancelled

Go Daffy, I understand perfectly.  It all started early yesterday morning with a visit to Medicare/Centrelink and if I ever find out which imbecile decided it would be a good idea to move Medicare from Southland to the middle of nowherebus, I will pull his limbs off and beat him to death.
People everywhere so I decided not to wait and get my medicare card unhooked from my mother's bank account where it's been for 6 years.  What's another few months of her paying for my doctor's bills since she's the reason I visit.
Next Southland and a walk to the bus over cobblestones, up, down, sideways and no op shop buys because of a six inch step to get the walker over.  Bus came bringing trouble.  Now I know most women can multi-task with ease but wrangling a bag over the shoulder while getting the walker up the step while touching on the myki as you turn the corner into the bus proper and fall into a seat is a neat trick.
Getting off the bus in reverse is worse because there is a drop to the pavement which I usually manage by swinging off the pole. In this case it was touch off and bodily throw the walker out the door and buggar you lot waiting to get on, me first.
Missed the stop where the lift is.  Well, says I, managed the bus so what's the problem about an escalator.  Nothing actually except for the fact that the walker begins to tower over one's head as the bloody thing reaches the top, take the brakes off and don't let the bag slip off the shoulder and make a run like you're going for Platform 1+3/4.
Still on the 2nd floor and need 3rd but I know where the lift is.  $39 for a camera battery later and I'm on the downhill run and food.  I know I should have asked for it all in a bag but I've handled large trolleys and trays before but but small walkers, different animals.  Tray and food go one way, walker goes the other.  Thank you lovely girls who picked up the mess while I stood wanting to die.  Foodies gave me a free meal, darlings.
Still going downhill, heading towards the lift, decide because of screaming in pain foot to go down the travelvator.  Done that before with large trolley, but large trolley has grip wheels, walker doesn't and is wobbling from side to side because there's no way I'm letting go of one hand on the rail. 
I'm still on the 2nd floor, need ground floor for eggs so groan all the way to the lift, gallantly let women and children go first only because of the screaming and waving of ice-creams. 
Finally eggs, lettuce and Aldi's treasure of Christmas goodies which I wasn't going in for but specials which I was, hadn't arrived yet.  Muttering under breath I finally stagger towards taxi.
Driver very kindly throws walker onto back seat where it just fits.  Throws everything else in as well, the eggs survived. Throws everything out when we reach home sweet home.
Walker in front, try opening large gate without doing in a rib.  Lift walker over the half inch to the driveway, walk half on grass and half on drive because it doesn't fit.  Lift walker up two steps, lose another rib opening front door, lift walker up step to house.
Run in grab phone and cancel order for ritzy big arse walker.  I am not going anywhere where I will have the need to sit down.

Same thing today. Taxi to Doc Marvin who falls on desk laughing when I crash into his office door after missing the half inch carpet strip.  Blood pressure up a bit 166/80, BGL up but consistantly the same up for the last two months and it's not much.  Blood test sometime before Christmas.  BGL my fault for not reading the bottle that says take two, I can't see the damn things let alone read at that time of the morning. I have a full box of panic pills but I panic if I don't have a script.  All done.
Crash walker into surgery door  because it opens in.  Nearly fall over the footpath where the gumtree has tilted it like an earthquake landslide.
Safely across the road, safely to the bus stop, safely into the bus with the help of a schoolkid.  Driver waits patiently for me to negotiate downward to the footpath.  Kerb is six inches below me so by this time throwing the walker and following is becoming second nature.  Negotiate 3 doors into the Home where I fall into a chair and get hysterical laughter instead of sympathy. And that was my mother.

So I have worked out exactly where I will be walking with walker and it's not far.  The taxi company will be safely in the black while I'm out and about. Stuff buses.  There is a plus, I didn't panic once about falling over because of my lousy balance. On the minus side it didn't help one bit with the foot crunching pain. 

Sunday, November 08, 2015

Downhill run to Christmas

That's Cup Week over for another year and I bet there's a lot of feet that felt like they'd been wearing this shoe.  And for once I loved the Cup run, a female won on a 101-1 cracker of a horse trained in Australia.  That's what makes the Cup a special race, no matter how much money you pour into a horse to win, in this race it's all chance.

My sister has had her knee replacement. A brutal, brutal operation that she will never have done ever again even if she has to hobble if the other knee gives out.  Not a word to me who had it done 20 years ago, two knees 15 months apart.  She had the whole knee replaced, I kept the kneecaps because it was supposed to be easier.  I have scars 33cms long, she has a 6 inch fine scar with 4 steri-strips and no external stitches.  My surgeon worked with his own physiotherapist and the minute I opened my eyes I was exercising, as far as I know she hasn't had any physio yet but is pleased with her 90 degree bend.  After 6 weeks I was up to 135 degrees.  I know this isn't a competition but she's so bloody smug about everything except the pain.  She has pain, she rang up asking when did the pain stop, bwahahahaha!  Lovely.

Mother is still here.  She is getting new bottom teeth and with Murphy's law will be buried with new choppers. The Home has been taken over by Southern Cross Care and handover will be March 2016. 
I think that's when I went clunk, the worry about if I'd have to move her or what was going on, if anything, suddenly stopped.  Their catering staff have already taken on the kitchen and the food is the best in the 6 years she's been there.  Any complaints and the Chef comes to talk to the resident in person.  She's already worked out a menu for mum for the no teeth weeks.  I might even get myself down there for a decent Christmas Dinner this year.

I still have my saved up loot for the new big A walker.  I'm on a loaner at the moment and you lot are lucky that I don't drive a car.  I'm bad enough on the footpath with four wheels let alone on a road. I have to make a decision soon before everything shuts for the loony season but after the treadmill disaster, I'm being careful.  I have tried to walk on the treadmill with trainers but the foot still hurts like hell and will never be better.  At least the walker helps with my terrible balance problem.  I still look like I'm two sheets to the wind when walking but with something to hold onto it feels better. 

Vinnie's car has left the building to be replaced by a bucket of rust.  But I am assured that this is a collector's item and he was so lucky to get it in this condition. If I could have stood up again, I'd have rolled on the ground laughing.  But I was shown photos of newly renovated rust buckets and I have to admit they are good looking cars.  He did tell me what kind of car it was but you know me and cars, I only know they have 4 wheels outside and one inside.  Still have the Falcon and the soft top VW which I have seen painted in a rich metallic crimson and black.  I fell in love with that. He says no, basic blue and cream top, damn.  My sister is still carrying on about him making my house look like a tip but a no rent driveway for a year makes a cheap Christmas present.

I am still hoping to convince Miss O'Dyne to start a new blog about her adventures in country living but she is busy chopping trees, killing snakes and being .05 every time she collects the mail from the pub. I sat outside the local milkbar in the sun this morning and thought how lovely for summer nights if they could get a drink licence for the locals.  Then I thought about getting that bloody walker across the road, so maybe not.

As a final word, isn't life dull without the Mad Monk and Hokey Hockey?

Tuesday, November 03, 2015

Overdue, everything called life.

Which is why I haven't blogged for so long.
Hopefully my fogged up mind will see me through what's left of the year.
I mean who shoved Christmas this close to my breakdown.

Wednesday, September 30, 2015

Now this is a fountain.

I love this fountain and I want it in my garden.  A nice deck chair or something more sturdy for me and I could sit and meditate on the splashing of the water especially with the sun behind, making little rainbows for my wishes. It came from the imagination of Malgorzata Chodakowska.

A lot has happened at the Home which we are now referring to as Mushroom House, keeping us in the dark and feeding us bullshit.  With 2 days warning the kitchen was turned over to an American hospitality company, our tea ladies were fired but the favourite chef was kept on because they couldn't find anyone who would work Sunday/Monday for the same amount of money.  I was not offered a cup of tea  yesterday so from now on I'll take my own cup and tea bag and ask for hot water.
The one thing they have re-installed is for the relatives to have a meal with their husbands or wives, cost of $5.  This is great for the men who usually go home and don't bother eating properly.

Now we just wait to see if they tell us the facility has also been sold to an American company.  A certain mother's Doc received a letter saying his arrangement with the Council Aged Care Group would not be continued did not go down well.  He is my mother's personal doctor and the inference was that she would have to use the doctor that will go with the big new Aged Care Centre which isn't built yet.  He was busy yesterday drafting a reply that will probably blister paint.  After searching for anything regarding the sale on line, I came across a small article that mentions the land being decontaminated  since it was used as the Council Depot for Everything.  That company walked away with $1.1 million dollars.  They should have decontaminated a few Councillors for that amount.

The hard rubbish collection took no prisoners this year.  Usually they have a variety of trucks for small, medium and large but this time a huge behemoth on wheels went down one side of the street and up the other and ate everything even my sofa bed with the steel frame.  The nature strips looked as though nothing had ever been on the grass, I've never seen a collection like it, gone in 60 seconds.
Most of the neighbours didn't put out until the weekend which didn't give much time for us to have a look and make a midnight run.  It seemed the gutter crawlers were only interested in scrap metal this year.  I was very good but I'm still crying for the cupboard across the road and the hat rack around the corner.  
And I really wanted two chairs to try and make this bench, just right for meditating near a fountain. There's always next year.

Saturday, September 19, 2015

Hard rubbish, I don't haz it

This is going to be me tomorrow morning after I take every pain killer in the house over the next 12 hours.
I wish I could show you a photo of the hard rubbish collection but it would have meant walking back to the house for the camera and back again.  Way too far.
Even too far to check out a nice looking cupboard across the road that the junk crawlers haven't touched.  It would paint up very nicely.  I'm being strong this year, all goings, no comings.
With all the raining this week I didn't want the sofa bed and the big lounge chair sitting out there going mouldy and Thursday was out because it was bin day.  I nearly broke every bone in my body as it was staggering out in the dark and rain with stupid bins and they weren't emptied until nearly 5 next day.
The Home was Friday and I was late home.
So Saturday, morning was sunny and I'd already hauled the sewing machine out into the lounge.
Checked the sofa and remembered to turn in on its back to go through the door.  Problem, last time I moved it there wasn't a bookcase there. 
Books are lovely in neat rows in bookcases. Books are a nightmare when they are taken out but I did have two candy striped bags ready.  Forgot how heavy books are even in bags.  Bookcase dragged to the other side of the room along with every other bit of rubbish in there.
But the sofa bed slipped along the carpet nicely and cleared the door, both doors with room to spare.
The lounge chair didn't look as big when I removed the cushions so that went out first. 
Will I wait until the BOH turns up or be Wonder Woman and get it to the nature strip.  No problem I just rolled it, as much as one can roll a square chair.  There was a bit of clunking but I did it. I found the cushions more of a nuisance.
Next, sofa bed but this time I thought I would leave it on the porch.  Him next door came in and apologized because he'd been away for a week and hadn't been in to help. BOH turns up on his way to OfficeWorks so he was instructed to buy cardboard boxes to clean up his car parts in the car port.
Old window blinds went out.  Then his mate spotted the sewing machine which I'd just taken out of the old treadle machine housing.  BOH spotted it as well and it will be on ebay sometime next week.
Now if I can just get him to take away the treadle plate and wheel I'll have more room for my feet.
It was a wrench because I'd made all my baby clothes on that machine but on top is my old Myer machine, solid steel, none of this plastic rubbish.  Everytime I move it I'm moving two steel machines and I'm getting past that.
I still have the treadmill.  Even looking at it gives me pain up to the kneecaps.  Somewhere, someone is desperate for a treadmill and I hope they find each other one day.
Now I'm going to order pizza for tea, have a hot shower and take painkillers.  Maybe  I should insert, put rest of books back in bookcase.  One shelf is done and only because I am putting them in sections this time, fantasy, crime, autobiography and crap, why on earth made me buy you.
Tomorrow the boxes of jewellery and beads are leaving the lounge room for their new home.

Of course you know what's going to happen, all this space, room to move, I'm sure to fall a over t.