There's nothing like a shoe box full of surprises and this one is a beauty. Piper Heidsiek Brut and a crystal Louboutin shoe to drink it from. It was supposed to be the epitome of love to drink Champagne from your latest floozie's slipper but it always seemed to me to be a waste of good booze. This is better but I hope Posh Beckham doesn't see it, I wouldn't put it past her to try walking in a pair.
That's an odd pair of shoes. Judging by the one on the left, I assume they originally belonged to Heather Mills McCartney.
ReplyDelete"Heather showed me her leg, Norwegian Wood, wasn't it good..."
ReplyDeleteSeriously, that crystal will need to be swabbed thoroughly to get rid of all the Tinea lurking in the nooks and crannys :P
Forget the shoe, just swig it from the bottle. The shoe would be hard to wash and dry I'm thinking.
ReplyDeleteHere's a saying from my childhood: "You'd drink it from a dirty old boot." Meaning plonk of course. And kids would yell it at old people, ragged old men, poor things. Really, it was a shocking circumstance, very low neighbourhood.
ReplyDeleteIt's a wonder I've turned out so well, absolute wonder; I haven't barked at fake New Yorkers for at least six weeks.
ReplyDeleteCham-pagne for my real friends ... shoe pain for my fake friends.
ReplyDeleteBwahahahaha, Fleetwood's back in form.
ReplyDeleteJayne, taking the fun out of the crystal. Actually I haven't worked out which end you drink it from, either way I'd spill it.
River, a suggestion after my own heart but towards the end I'd be hard put lifting the bottle let alone finding my mouth.
Robbert, the things children learn from their parents. "You'd drink it through an Afghan's underpants" was another pleasantry.
Good one Marshall, I can't wait for the Spring Racing Carnival to watch the spindly tarts get stuck in the grass.
Some old boiler is going on again about this Men v Women crap. They're in a vice and it's hilarious: they can't knock a foreign culture but can't support polygamy. Oh golly.
ReplyDeleteI worked it out the other night, I've had sex with 132 women. -Some good looking and some ugly. There's about three I dwell on, three I miss.
Robbert, quite the stud in your younger days but not quite the gentleman to have notched the bedpost.
ReplyDeleteAll of mine have been totally forgettable even the ex.
Well pardon me, If I'd notched the bed post it would have collapsed, there were times I needed something to grab hold of.
ReplyDeleteDear Robert, I wouldn't touch that feed line with a forty foot pole.
ReplyDeleteYes you would.
ReplyDeleteAnd for all you blokes who've achieved a lower score than me, I can assure you most of it was shameful, I had more dignity as a Peeping Tom; at least I could pass it off as research.
I'm inspired to take a picture of my cherry red granny shoes (complete with orthotics) next to an empty bottle of cleanskin merlot. A bit of realism, I say.
ReplyDelete(RH, "barking at fake New Yorkers", love the imagery. Not going near the bed post though.)
I already have glass heels. That's why I'm always on my back.
ReplyDeleteHeart the blog, darling.
Rh, you would have earned a PhD in Peeping Tom with your research.
ReplyDeleteBella, nothing wrong with red granny shoes but Merlot? With your taste in men you shouldn't be allowed near good booze, a matching cask wine would do or for my peace of mind, soda water.
Lee, If I'd known you were coming I'd have baked a cake and rolled out the red carpet with a couple of bois wrapped in it. Padded red carpet, you fall on your back so easily.