I haven't been following the news much. The first time I turned on I had Costello speaking to that right wing think tank and re-kindling Pauline H's xenophobic flames. Since I already felt sick I didn't need much more for full blown nausea.
My sister rang to tell me about the young musician who was stabbed at Box Hill station. It is a long dark platform and we were standing there a few weeks back on our way to Upwey and she was really disturbed by the atmosphere.
She couldn't shake the feeling until we were well on our way and the carriage was full of sunlight and she had checked out who was in our carriage. It's usually me who's nervous about going into an area I don't know but she isn't except for this platform.
Today I'm not in pain, everything has gone back to being numb. This seems to be the cycle and it will no doubt be followed by the burning pain phase but not before I have the X-rays. Before I was told to get painkillers and whack it on the head, the only relief was to walk the house on two walking sticks until it eased enough to crawl back into bed. This was gibbering type pain and I know pain and there was no way I was making this pain my friend.
I've gone on about it and laughed when I got a bit better but never far from my mind are the people who deal with this on a daily basis. The ones who have no medication let alone a bed they can crawl into. I thought too of the others who rise above it and go off and do miraculous things with their life. It makes me feel selfish that I will get better and won't do miraculous things. But for every one person who makes it to the top of the painpit and who never gives in, there are a few thousand crawling around the bottom looking for an easier way up. Some never make it. I've cheated death quite a few times, come out the other side of a lot of pain, mostly due to a filthy sense of humour that sees the funny side of watching my body fall to pieces.
I never can forget that there are millions suffering because of the superiority of certain people, of all religions who think they know the secret of what is good for humankind. I'd like to see those people, in pain, hungry, terrified, with no shelter from death in all its shapes and forms. Let them make decisions in this alternate reality, for them, but the reality for so many men, women and children.
Having said that and meaning it, humour raises me up and I wish I could remember through the painkillers what brilliant announcement I made to the Jevohah's the other day that left them speechless and heading for the gate. It must have been good since they usually argue and I know I didn't swear. Why can't religions keep to themselves and stop annoying us who don't want it.