Monday, July 03, 2006

DAMN! DAMN! DAMN!



This is Mum and her great granddaughters taken at Easter when we started the Merry-go-round.

This morning was the usual 20 minutes of pill taking instructions and she toddled off to have breakfast. Fast forward one hour when I arrive to find her sitting on her bed with a huge box of weetbix and a carton of milk. She says there's something wrong with the bowl because she can't see where the milk has gone, by bowl, she means the box which has a spoon in it. This can't be good and it isn't. I get her into the lounge room where it's warm but she can't sit in her chair because she can't remember which way to move. She can't drink her tea because she can't remember what to do with the cup. This is way beyond even a UTI infection type confusion.

I've just spent eight hours in emergency with her. She's had a brain scan, blood tests, urine tests, memory tests, co-ordination tests. The only thing they can find is slightly elevated white blood cells and a slight excess of liver enzymes. Everything else is clear, even the cut has healed completely. Nurses and doctors would wander by and ask questions. Sometimes the answer would be coherant, other times she wouldn't remember what was asked. At one stage the doctor asked if she knew who the Prime Minister was, "That thing Howard," she answered. The doctor asked who would she prefer to be Prime Minister, "Anyone but him," she said.

She's been admitted for observation. The doctor's opinion is that there is definitely something radically wrong but as yet it hasn't shown up in the ordinary tests. So she's safe for the moment. I don't have to worry about burning toast or the microwave blowing up.

She had a student doctor who asked about her previous medical history so I handed him the list. He will really have to learn to keep a poker face. Mum wanted to know why he was wearing a party hat, need I say he was Jewish. She wasn't asleep when I left but she looked very comfortable.

I walked into my sister's place and downed a can of Smirnoff Black before I realized what it was. I can't believe I can see this screen since that would usually wipe me out. I wish I had another can now, in fact I think I'll give up healthy living, it only lets you get older. I wish I could kick Aunt Selma in her bad knee. My sister has already dealt with Aunt Patty and with great delight.
I don't like this year, I want another one.

11 comments:

Daniel said...

Your mother's comment about Howard showed great wisdom. Hang in there!

Regarding the Ian-Iain issue, I'll just await developments.

Take care!

ThirdCat said...

Yes, last year my father was in a very serious medical predicament as were all the other people around him, and whenever a doctor came in asking those kinds of questions we held our breath and thought 'just don't ask him who the prime minister is, anything but that'. And thankfully they never did. It would have been the end of him for sure.

ThirdCat said...

Also, it is very odd to be calling it emergency and then having to spend eight hours there, isn't it?

Take care.

Kelly & Sam Pilgrim-Byrne said...

Oh, poop. When will you know what's going on?

She's spot on about Howard, though.

Thinking of you both.

JahTeh said...

Hey Muriels, when will I know what's going on with you? I'm waiting for good news you know.

Thirdcat, believe me I was quite content to sit there and feast my eyes on Dr. Yummy. I'm sure I ordered one of him for Christmas.

Daniel, that issue seems to be doing the round of the blogs.

Kelly & Sam Pilgrim-Byrne said...

JT... blood test on Saturday.

Everything firmly crossed.

Daniel said...

The Four Corners programme on Monday night was a bit scary. Seemed to expose some myths about doctors and nurses and hospitals (no, not the naughty games we all played as children!).

Do you still remember those days, the energy, the enthusiasm, the optimism? How gullible and innocent we were, so full of dreams most of which never came true.

Life, I guess, is a living example of the law of diminishing returns. To compensate, we must create new dreams, ones that fit the emerging realities.

Cheers and hugs!

Link said...

I sincerely hope you're mother's taking the piss. Is that possible? (I wish mine's was).

She clearly still has a sense of humour, so that's the main bit right, I hope for your sake, she's OK.

Zoe said...

oh big hug, JT. You should buy a bloody lottery ticket.

JahTeh said...

'Taking the piss' very funny Link considering how many times I was on the wrong end of the pan for the afternoon.

It was a big choice Zoe, lottery ticket, vodka, lottery ticket, vodka and the Smirnoff won. I'm all for instant gratification.

JahTeh said...

I didn't watch Four Corners, I had my head in a vodka can but I will try to catch the transcript at the ABC site. The only dream I had as a child, Daniel, was to be rich enough to buy all the books in the world now I'd like to buy the time to read them.