Thursday, November 30, 2006
ANNUAL DROOL FEST
Well you can't say I don't run an equal pervetunity blog. The model is Karolina Kurkova and she's modelling the year's Hearts On Fire Diamond fantasy bra. The bra is in the balconet style, weighs 800 carats and has more than 2000 perfectly cut diamonds. The centrepiece is a 10 carat Hearts On Fire diamond brooch. The whole thing is an absolute steal at $10 million. It took over 20,000 hours to cut and polish the diamonds and the bra took more than 300 man hours (man hours?) to fabricate. It's more expensive than the $6.5 million diamond dress created for the 2002 Oscars. I'm trying to figure how much it would cost to make it for me considering her bra size and mine. There could be a slight problem with keeping upright, the weight and gravity could have me hovering 2 inches above the footpath. No problem in the old days, whalebone corsets would let a woman load up with at least 2 kilos of bling. I miss the old days.
This was in my letter box when I got home, it's in the Christmas Catalogue for Trewarne's Posh Jewellery Which I Will Never Afford unless I get the ozlootto jackpot next Tuesday night. They send me the catalogue because I get my rings valued there for the insurance and they probably think I have money. I would have money if someone steals the rings, I leave the doors and windows open and lay a trail of breadcrumbs but all I get are possums stealing apples. The catalogue is glossy, the model is classy and skinny and doesn't need the baubles to look a million dollars. Her nails are short though, diamonds look lousy with short nails. Thank goodness I found something to pick on.
Nothing jumped out of the pages and grabbed me by the wallet. Just the ordinary routine diamond bits and bobs albeit big expensive bits and bobs. I have a ring that I drool over. I actually moved a naked bloke off the fridge door to put up it's photo. Stephano Cantauri designed it, that's the jeweller that made the necklace for Nicole Kidman to wear in 'Moulin Rouge'. This ring is so delicious that I wouldn't care if it was glass or diamonds. If I had the chance to get it on my finger (ozlootto - come to witchy) I would have it made up with every colour of Australian sapphires.
I'm going to ignore the two requests for bill payment that came in the same mail. I'm off to cruise the three jewellery websites at the back of the catalogue.