Some people leave footprints on our heart.
Cats leave fur on our sweaters.
Dogs leave drool on our shoes.
Families will crap on our doorstep.
So when life gives you crap, garden it and make roses.
Thursday, February 14, 2008
VALENTINE SMALENTINE
FOR ALL THE BLOKES WHO DIDN'T SEND ME A VALENTINE -
FEAST YOUR EYES ON WHAT YOU'RE MISSING!!
BWAHAHAHAHHAHA!!!!!!
15 comments:
Anonymous
said...
Happy morbidity day to us both. nah....fuck that we are the lucky ones! xxx
That is a Priscilla Queen of The Dragons if evah I saw one, and smart enough to swerve away from the unseen molasses so that swallowtail butterfly does not have a Beezlebublog experience.
I have lots of secret admirers I'm sure, but they all seem to be illiterate, or not have the price of a stamp ... or are just plain scared to reveal themselves. suits me, as I would rather have time to read funny clever blogs, than waste it painting my nails or conditioning my hair in order to measure up to anybody's adoration.
I didn't even send Michelle a valentine card...mainly because we decided years ago that Valentine's Day is another sociologically controlled enforcement of insincere sentiment designed for couples who treat each other with little or no respect for the rest of the year to buy off their consciences. Seeing as I'm a romantic, considerate and wonderful partner all the time, Valentine's Day therefore becomes the one day of the year when I can ignore her completely and go out to the pub with my mates.
Unfortunately I don't have any male friends, as such...certainly none that I'd want to go down the pub with...so it's much the same as usual. I cooked her egg and chips for tea and left her to watch CSI Miami whilst I'm on the net. The perfect Valentine, see.
Witchy...I washed up. I always do. And I do the shopping and the housework every day. And I feed the cat. I'm a good little Hector. Mind you, Michelle goes out to work to earn the money to keep me quietly drunk, so it's only fair.
As for Valentine's day, my aged parents still buy each other cards. Some people will never recognise the crass, manipulative homogenisation of sentiment as packaged and commercialised by Hallmark, more's the pity.
15 comments:
Happy morbidity day to us both.
nah....fuck that we are the lucky ones!
xxx
That is a Priscilla Queen of The Dragons if evah I saw one, and smart enough to swerve away from the unseen molasses so that swallowtail butterfly does not have a Beezlebublog experience.
I have lots of secret admirers I'm sure, but they all seem to be illiterate, or not have the price of a stamp ... or are just plain scared to reveal themselves.
suits me, as I would rather have time to read funny clever blogs, than waste it painting my nails or conditioning my hair in order to measure up to anybody's adoration.
Which one are you?
I didn't even send Michelle a valentine card...mainly because we decided years ago that Valentine's Day is another sociologically controlled enforcement of insincere sentiment designed for couples who treat each other with little or no respect for the rest of the year to buy off their consciences. Seeing as I'm a romantic, considerate and wonderful partner all the time, Valentine's Day therefore becomes the one day of the year when I can ignore her completely and go out to the pub with my mates.
Unfortunately I don't have any male friends, as such...certainly none that I'd want to go down the pub with...so it's much the same as usual. I cooked her egg and chips for tea and left her to watch CSI Miami whilst I'm on the net. The perfect Valentine, see.
I cooked her egg and chips for tea and left her to watch CSI Miami whilst I'm on the net.
Bliss.
Sorry about the cryptic name, I'll change it.
How embarrassment.
Phwoar! You like superhot! I'll be your Valentine!! xx
Sorry Steph, my accident insurance isn't up to you being my valentine.
Helen, I knew exactly who that was, cryptic and all. Dear Hughes might have cooked the egg and chips but who cleaned up?
Fleetwood, Valentine's Day like Christmas is strictly for the young not us who've reached and passed the age of cynicism.
I got Valentine cards even up to the year he left me, he used to sign them with the cats' names.
Hello mobidity, another cynic I see.
Witchy...I washed up. I always do. And I do the shopping and the housework every day. And I feed the cat. I'm a good little Hector. Mind you, Michelle goes out to work to earn the money to keep me quietly drunk, so it's only fair.
As for Valentine's day, my aged parents still buy each other cards. Some people will never recognise the crass, manipulative homogenisation of sentiment as packaged and commercialised by Hallmark, more's the pity.
To all my say-sorry-kick-men-in-the-balls feminist darlings...
Here's your Valentine:
Impetuous you
After a glass or two
Thought violets are red
And roses blue.
ROBBERT!!!!
ha ha ha!
Give some dough to someone, you tightarse bourgeois feminist lot of CREEPS!
Miss Brownie. Miss Croggon.
Goodness me....
How interesting, that my nearest rivals for Greatest Poet in Australia are both drunks.
ROBBBBERT!!!!!!
Ahhh I'm often mistaken for the good looking dragon in that pic :P
Fleetwood, you're a house elf, no wonder you hate Harry Potter.
Jayne, I would only have the prettiest floweriest dragon ever.
Robbert, a good kick in the balls makes everyone feel good, the woman feels good doing it and the bloke feels good when the pain subsides.
Hello.
I've some dragons in my time, but that is a dragon.
Phil, glad to see you haven't been drowned, bitten by snakes or eaten by crocs. There's been a bit of rain around Qld way.
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