You know the drill by now. If you've got a mother you love, stop reading and back away from the blog.
Last night I kind of hurt myself, painfully. I'm used to the left kneecap moving off its tracks if I've been doing too much walking and not giving it a rest. It always happens in bed so I do the usual treatment to fix it which is too involved to go into but last night there was a new development. As I turned over, the quad muscle went into pain orbit and I really thought it had detached itself from the bone.
After the requisite amount of swearing and a lot of moaning, I tried to get out of bed. I couldn't stand upright at all. The knee had stopped hurting but not the rest of the leg. The only way I could get to the freezer and an ice-pack was to walk with feet and hands on the ground. Regardless of blubber I'm still flexible enough to do this. The minute I tried to stand up, pain. I always keep the nurse-on-call number by the phone but if I call then there are certain things to be done first.
After getting the ice-pack, unlock the back door in case of ambulance. In case of ambulance, put on nightdress. To make the call, put in teeth. Luckily I didn't need to call, the ice-pack worked on what must have been a tremendous muscle spasm from putting the knee back in place.
So where does mother come in? She rings this afternoon because she can't find the supplies she needs (don't ask) and I tell her they're in the sewing room, green bag, just inside the door. She says she's looked and there's nothing there and she hopes I get as sick as she is one day and have no-one to call. Wrong day to say this, not that it isn't said at least once a week, so she gets told to shut up and the phone crashed in her ear. I yelled so loudly, I think the whole street had a minute's silence.
Sister calls in and mother tells her she has enough supplies to last as she found them in the green bag in the sewing room.