This is what I looked like this morning, all empty with hair. Three ice packs last night to stop the legs going into spasms, lots of groaning and swearing when I had the legs fixed, the back went. The knee is swollen from the bus steps and trying to get into new taxis that have a board too high to slide the feet inside. It's now lift and swing including the two bags I'm usually carrying. Put having to use the gnome sized toilets at Southland into the mix plus up and down and up and down for things mother wanted done, I should have know to whack on the ice as soon as I staggered in the back door.
But my diabetes and cholesterol are under control considering what a mess they were this time last year. Triglicerides are up but I've been missing my Omega-3 fish oil a bit so now it's one a day for the next 6 months to see if it makes a difference. That and exercise which doesn't figure a lot in my life but we are now trying a third fluid tablet to help the legs and feet. The other two were too strong and made me feel very unwell after 3 or 4 days. My kidneys are fine though. We just won't talk about the elephant in the room which is me.
So now it's February and it's been a year since I heard from my eldest granddaughter. I presume she made it back from Europe okay. Next week she will be, if I've done my sums right, 21 years old. I still remember every minute of the day she was born like it was yesterday. I suppose I will have to email her other grandparents and find out what they are doing for her birthday, down here or in Queensland. There's no way I will contact her Queen Bitch of the Universe of a mother to ask. I don't usually hold a grudge but with her, the grudging will be forever. It doesn't matter that I know why she did what she did, a grudge is the least I can do when I'm not the type to hit someone over the head with a blunt object. I don't talk to her, I don't think about her, she does not exist in my world, she exists only in my grudging.
She is why I don't keep in touch with my girls, it only gets them into trouble. They email or ring when they can so I never push them. They know where I live, I've let them go and they've come back, they always will.