Wednesday, November 15, 2006

SPAM GOES TOO FAR

"Treacle pudding, fish and chips, fizzy drinks and liquorice, flowers, rivers, sand and sea, snowflakes and the stars are free. He's goin' everywhere, B.J. If you've got a problem chum, think how it could be. It's true I hire my body out for pay, hey hey. Every stop I make, I make a new friend. Sharing everything with fun, that's the way to be. There's a voice that keeps on calling me. Thunder, thunder, thundercats, Ho! Thundercats are on the move, Thundercats are loose. McKay and this is my best friend Bear. I take care of both of them, which ain't easy, 'cause when they met it was MURDER! La la la la la, la la la la la la la, la la la la la la la, la la la la la la la la la la la la la, so - Barnaby The Bear's my name, never call me Jack or James, I will sing my way to fame, Barnaby the Bear's my name. Ma"

That was one spam message I received today and I didn't click on the link that preceeded it.

The next two spam messages were by any standards, pure written pr0n. I believe my mouth fell open. I'm used to the offers to prolong my s*xual joy but these didn't offer that and they both had links to click but I wasn't walking through that door. I don't know where they came from but I wish I could send a rocket back.

I've also been getting spam with part of my outlook mail address which hasn't happened before.

The only places I leave that is the few blogs that require it. I'll have to remember to use the gmail one from now on.

Sorry Russian ladies but I can't help you and as for the polish refugee with money in some far away bank account, sorry to you too. I wish the Israeli stockbrocker would realise I don't have any money to spare. In fact I'd wish you'd all go to spam hell.

9 comments:

janet said...

Spam Hell...interesting scenario.
Crush four C1al!s tablets and dissolve in brandy. In a small saucepan combine a few stock options with one or two loan requests; add in The Perfect Gift and stir briskly until your Swiss Rolex Watch says it's been three minutes. Slowly add the brandy mixture to the saucepan contents, then dribble the marinade over as many Rock Hard Items to Please Your Lady as are lying around the house. After six hours remove the Potted Meat from the marinade and sprinkle with crumbled V!agr4. Throw the entire contents mixture down into the fire with your left hand while flecting a bit of genuwith your right. Turn your back, run out to dinner with your Loved One, where you will present to her The Ultimate Gift and you will both Look Very Sophisticated....

janet said...

Oh dam n I pushed the Publish not Preview button....

Anyway, when you get back home, your bedroom will have the alluring aroma of burnt spam which of course will stimulate you to Be the Best of the Best this Night and More. If you don't Please Your Lady then at least it is nice to know that AUNI is capitalizing with great success on the growing
resource demands in China.

JahTeh said...

Last Winter Olympics, everyone cheered for the Canadian/Australian who won gold until someone in the know let slip his money was made from Malware. I know where I'd liked to have shoved his medal.

R H said...

Spam goes too far, yes it does. But listen darlings (and I hope Miss Brownie sees this) tonight and tomorrow night are your last chance to get along and see the Williamstown Musical Theatre Company's production of SHOUT: The Legend of the Wild One, Johhny O'Keefe. Wooh! I went last Friday and it's a ripper! The two young ladies with me (plus the boyfriend of one of them who is a bingo caller) loved it. I tell you, for $28 a ticket you won't ever see a better show. It's on at Williamstown Mechanic's Institute which seats only about three hundred, but it's been packed out every night. You can get a glass of plonk there too (Miss Brownie) at interval and before the show. RH had an ice cream. Well you know me, very circumspect. ha ha ha.

www.wmtc.org.au

Okay? Hit it!

A little bit louder now,
A little bit louder now,
A little bit louder now,
A little bit louder now,
-A little bit louder now,
-A little bit louder now,
-A little bit louder now,
-A little bit louder now,

-----SHOUT!!!

Ron said...

You're gamer than I am, JT. I would never open obvious spam: it's the only way I've ever got viruses (virii?) on my computer.

kurt said...

today's subject matter lineup of my spam:
To extolled go maggoty...
And of whet...
Be the microbial...

I can't believe there is any payback for the efforts of sending stuff like this.

kurt reply said...

Oh, and see, I had to come back this evening and tell you of the latest fascinating subject line of a filtered spam message:
Not exogamy of riven...
Oh, I will definitely get one of those.
In fact, I'll take a dozen.

kurt said...

Oh, and one more thing...
Last spring I ordered a book from Amazon. Next day I got an email trying to sell me insurance or something from--get this--the author of the book I'd ordered. The name was not at all a common name. This was no coincidence. Weird. Totally weird.
Spambots, be damned!
Copperwitch should be able to work up some sort of hex, shouldn't she?

JahTeh said...

Ron this was the message, the spam was in the link above it and I didn't touch that.

RH, I won't get that out of my head for a week. Will you ever forget Six O'Clock Rock?

Honestly Kurt the porn messages were gross and I've no idea where they came from. My naked guys are sourced from non-porn places. I've been getting a lot of mail from banks asking for details and I don't know why people are still falling for that one.