Saturday, December 30, 2006

ANOTHER LAST POST


The geriatric pillock of a cat had a 'Grande Mal' seizure which could be a brain tumour or heat stress. The heat stress is unlikely since he hadn't moved off the feather cushion in six hours. He slept it off in the garden, came in and stared at his empty dish, which I immediately rushed to fill and is now sound asleep behind the couch. He was going to sleep under the side table but gave me a look that clearly said there's cat piss here and went behind the couch. He may not have another one so it's wait and see time.

Phone rings......

Me. "Hello."
Mother. "What's your sister's phone number? I've forgotten it and I can't remember what pills I have to take at 7 o'clock."
Me. "What's wrong with me telling you about the pills?"
Mother. "You're not here."
Me. "Are you holding the pill docette?"
Mother. "Yes, I'm not an idiot."
Me. "Are you on the row that says Saturday?"
Mother. "Is today Saturday?"
Me. "Find the two pills marked 'tea' and take them."
Mother. "Do I take them before or after tea?"
Me. "You've had tea, take the bloody pills."
Mother. "How do you know? You don't know everything."
Me. "I was talking to sis when you rang, I know you've had tea."
Mother. "Are you two talking about me behind my back?"
Me. "Take the pills."
Mother. "I take the two pills marked tea and today's Saturday. See there's nothing wrong with me."

Between her and the cat.............

52 comments:

phil said...

"Pillock". Now there's a word you don't hear all that often any more. It's very expressive, imho.

Andrew said...

Your pussy looks quite healthy considering how old it is.

R H said...

Miss Jahteh, my dear friend, you have won the RH award for Best Personal Blog. Congratulations. You truly deserve it.

Brownie said...

Commending the good taste of Mr RH Esq., and ignoring the double entendre of cameraFace, I came here from your comment on his blog to say


"I have just read the book by bodyguard survivor Trevor Rees-Jones which has in it an interview with a crew member of the Jonikal, the yacht they left when they travelled to Paris.
The crew guy said that after The Crash, he got home to find a thank you note from Diana 'for making her yacht stay so pleasant'.
Prince William is marrying a hard-faced and calculating girl, unlike his mother, knowing that she will not easily be knocked about by That Family.

They do kill people:
"A FORMER pageboy to the Queen and lifelong friend of the Prince of Wales
has been accused of encouraging his former gamekeeper to rid his Perthshire grouse estate of eagles by poisoning them.
Ian Thomas, 42, has taken Lord Anthony Tryon to an employment tribunal, claiming unfair and constructive dismissal.
He further claimed: "Lord Tryon also said earlier that day:
"I have bought an estate and I will do what I like"

Tryon has previously had his wife (a Melbourne girl) killed, in an attempt to find for his friend Charles, a cache of loveletters which MUST be retrieved before Camilla becomes Queen.


and also that there are fortunes being made by scriptwriters less talented than you dear Copperwitch.

Brownie said...

Distracted by your other Commentors
is my excuse
for not honouring in my earlier comment,
that truly noble example of Felis Sylvestrus.

A 'life lived large' is written on his every whisker.
I hope he has an eternally cosy EverAfter in the company of the many loved and special companions waiting for us all.
He could however have another good 5 years left to torment you.

much love from me and wishing you only Good Things in the New Year. X X

Lord Sedgwick said...

Cuz'n Brown One, dare I say that I suspect that young Andrew is (advertently or inadvertently - I suspect the part the first - the lad does have 'form') channelling Mrs Slocombe - and her feline appendage.

JahTeh said...

Just called in to check and my answer to all of your comments has disappeared, sod blogger because it was here last night.

It was quite brilliant and I can't replace it.

Brownie said...

TRUE brilliance can never be replace dear Copperwitch.

I just discovered over at Boynton blog, a pome by Browning (no relation)

and I liked this bit:

"Rather I prize the doubt
Low kinds exist without,
Finished and finite clods, untroubled by a spark."

so I have to share.

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