Wednesday, June 27, 2007

DIET TIPS NOs. 324 TO 331

Burn your mouth with hot soup.

Eat ice-cubes for the next 24 hours.

Do not open the pictures in the email from

If you open the pictures DO NOT print out the recipe for Cheesecake Brownies.

Do not read text messages from a sister lounging by a logfire in a pub near the 11 Apostles.

If you read the message, do not answer her query, "Should I order the sticky date pudding for you? with cream?"

Do not be rude and text back "Choke". It won't help because you'll still want the bloody pudding.

I mean who goes down the Great Ocean Road in this weather just to booze in a warm pub all day and torture people with text messages. If you're reading this, tart, I'm spending your inheritance tomorrow.


Middle Child said...

aha ha ha ha ha...still laughing and thanks for this laughing state of moine

tigtog said...

siblings are cruel and unusual punishment

JahTeh said...

Glad to hear you laugh MC. The thought of sticky date pudding and me sitting there with Tofu and baked tomato. Phoeey.

She had to have the break, Tigtog, she hasn't picked a quadrella to win for weeks. She says it's betting burnout.

Link said...

Ah sisterly love, aint it sweet.(oops sorry jahteh).

Alexis, Baron von Harlot said...

Baked tomato could be worse, though. S'nice with basil and red wine vinegar on top. (Sorry. I realise that when sticky date pudding's in question, the niceness of baked tomato doesn't even register.)

JahTeh said...

She's just home now Link and today she went on the treetop walk in the Otway Ranges and it's freezing at sea level.

Alexis, I love tomatoes but sticky date pudding is in a class of its own especially with toffee sauce and cream, King Island double cream. No wishy washy single stuff.

Anonymous said...

I reakon you should call her and tell her that you just won the lotto and if she doesn't bring you some sticky date pud home for you immediately your not spending a cent on her!'ll have to act well or she might pick it, but if she does come back you can turn around and say...."jokes on you sis"!
That's what sisters are for afterall? Prankin eachother??????

JahTeh said...

Neo, not only did she not bring any back, she told a friend not to bother bringing her any chocolate ripple cake because she's dieting.
I'm dieting but I'll make an exception for chocolate ripple cake.

Anonymous said...

Sad to hear that it didn't work JT.....just make your own, boast about it and tell her you're never inviting her for high tea again! That should break even,yeah?


Ann ODyne said...

Glad to hear Sis is in a pub - anywhere.
I am very close to the Otways myself, but will not get any closer, having had enough of Really Tall Trees lately. more than enough.

re diets: I am tuning in to the Mikey Robbins story on Monday night ABCTV at 8pm - I always thought he was very clever and funny, so I look forward to his take on Uses For Food.

Anonymous said...

If you're reading this, tart, I'm spending your inheritance tomorrow.

Mmmm, tart! Rhubarb or treacle?