More of the synchrotron ducks.Click here to read that a duck's quack does echo. Thank you Lord Hughes for the misinformation. I'm still looking for ducks tongues.
Now you all know the drill, anyone with a nice mother, piss off and don't read any further.
The manipulating old bat has scored another one for the gipper. I will try to tell a cohe(rant) version of the can opener. The same can opener that went missing for months because she put it away with the Bamix because it was the same colour. She was walking around with it in the walker last Thursday and she was going to lend it to a neighbour to use as a demonstration model as said neighbour was going to sell them. Argument starts because we all use it. She says it's hers and she can do what she likes. Phone call later that night demands to know the name of the book because I'm not telling her so she can't give the neighbour the can opener. Book?? The one I get from the company that makes the can opener. What??? You know what I'm talking about. Crap??? The only book I get is Avon. That's the one she says. By this stage I believe Dame Joan Sutherland wouldn't have topped my high C. Time to ring the neighbour. She is going to train as a demonstrator for Tupperware and my mother said no-one uses the can opener so take it but neighbour did offer to pay for it but mother said no, they never use it. This is a $50 can opener we never use. I tell neighbour we use it all the time, no worries she says, I'll demonstrate with mine. Tell old bat next morning that it's Tupperware and put the can opener back in the drawer. "I knew that", she says.
My sister gave her chocolates for her birthday. She told the BrickOutHouse, she didn't really like them but said not to tell his mother. Sister know all this but asks if she liked them. According to the old bat, she didn't get a chance to find out since BrickOutHouse took them off her and ate them. Lying old toad has eaten a 750 gram box of Cadbury's Favourites in two days.
Sister caught her tonight, wandering up the hall with the walker stashed with chicken and pasta salad and two, TWO frozen desserts. She's hungry and has hardly eaten a thing all day. Excuse me, Old Bat. Who was there all day, cooking in the heat, freezing meals and getting your lunch of sandwiches and blueberries mini muffins all between unloading the dryer and dishwasher? Oh yes and she didn't really like the muffins but she'll freeze them in case there's nothing else to eat.
Sister nearly broke her fingers dialing the phone to tell me.
Pardon me while I have another Dame Joan moment. High CCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCC!