THE KARMA OF SPIDERS

Yes, they do evoke karma on anyone stupid enough to mock the hairy legged ones.

I've been watching one roam the ceilings of this house for weeks. I thought he might have fried himself by hiding in the downlight but not with the energy saving bulbs.

So he finally ended up in the bathroom, hopefully chewing on a few thousand silverfish. I drew the line at having a shower with him scootling round the ceiling above me. He decided the curtains might be a nice home, good, I could see his shadow with the sun behind.

Saturday morning and I reach the the handle of the toilet door but it's grown legs. He was around the door and up the wall before I could do anything. Back into the curtains. Back up in the corner where it's impossible to get him. So it was open the door, bang on the wall and check for hairy legs.

Sunday night, the same routine, the same corner. Early Sunday morning about 2 a.m., the cat wakes me for food. I have to do something about that cat's internal clock so I go to the loo and unusually for me, I turn on the light. It's nothing for me to wander around the house with no lights on. Do the ceiling check, okay we're right, he's gone.

Gone where? Well, where else but the toilet seat, sitting there with its little hairy legs gripped to the edge. I'm busting, he ain't moving and he's staring at me. I flipped him with the duster and he copped a squirt of flyspray on the way to the floor.

Here I am, duster and huge can of flyspray, I'm the danger so why did he have to charge across the floor, straight down the valley of death rode the hairy legs. I did a reasonable impression of Micheal Flatly and hairy legs shot into the bathroom where he got another belt of spray.

Did I mention I was busting and all the jigging around wasn't helping so gratefully I reclaimed my throne. Now to wash hands and dispose of deadylegs.

He's goooooooooone.

You can bet I'll be shaking out the towells for the next month.