Friday, April 21, 2017

Will migrants be grilled on the tradition of BBQ sausage on bread?

Dear Prime Minister and that other moron that seems to be attached to your side these days,

How many languages do you speak?
At least little Nigel Molesworthless spoke Mandarin.

Do you really think that Pauline Hanson would pass this test?  Perhaps another section should be added, 'foot in mouth' English. I suppose she can still speak 'Chippie' although her current BimBot wouldn't allow such vulgarity.

Shorten would pass, he speaks English and Butch Union. Umm, possibly knows the Qld code of beer can clicking but only the Secret Union Stuff.

Abbott speaks and lies in fluent English. There, another section  'Can you tell a lie like or believe one from a backbencher?'

Should cheating and running around the rules using 'Lawyer speak' be a separate section since so many Parlimentarians are so fluent in it?

And you wouldn't put Barnaby in charge of the language of the Bard, although I have heard he speaks 4 languages, English, Sheep Shit, Cow Crap and Utter Rubbish.

Ignore anyone in Parliament who comes from Queensland, not good with English but do seem to be fluent in Coal seam and mumbling with a secret code of beer can clicking.

Now dear Mr Trumpbull, er, Crumbull, damn let's just go with Malcolm, as warm and cuddly  as a dying Barrier Reef, I don't think you've given the new Migrant test for being a "Beer swilling, fly wrangling, thong wearing, sheila respecting, bloody good Aussie Bloke" a really good think. 
Won't somebody think of the children?  Our children who only speak Strine who'll be out there competing with migrants who must speak at least two languages, sometimes three if it's a dialect of the other two. 

 Parliamentarians should show an example, start at the top of the dung heap and it will trickle down to the peasantry.  Learn another language, speak it, read it, swear in it, cheat in it but show some guts and do what you're asking a 95 year old person, sometimes illiterate, probably traumatized from years of drone bombing whose only dream is peace and quiet and food.
So get orf ya bumcrack, take that beady eyed boofhead and have another go at alienating the world.

I, myself, have already set a fine example of speaking proper good English and a ripper dialect of Foul. 

Yours in Mateship, Coppy 
(see that, half way through a Phd in nickname)


Elephant's Child said...

You forgot Barney's first language - Pork Barrelling. Or perhaps that is his exercise routine.
I would like to see some politicians who could speak Compassion and Integrity. And despair about the current crop.

Annie ODyne said...

Bravo Ms Coppy - you always cut through the bumf to the arse of a matter.

Here is a simple outline:
If they want to live here they cannot have witchdoctors, they cannot own their female family, middle-eastern boys must respect female schoolteachers, Murricans cannot open carry guns, and British & Belgian migrants cannot keep people in basements for years.
However, whatever test the idiot govt cooks up, would most likely not be passed by half the 6th generation Australians born here.

River said...

All I can say to that is I'm glad my parents and me, and my sister, arrived way back before all this testing hoo-ha began. I couldn't learn another language if I tried. If I arrived now, they probably wouldn't let me off the boat.
Laughing at Miss O'Dyne's comment, which is an excellent idea.

JahTeh said...

El Chi, in his case it's elephant barrelling, look at the way he just moved an entire government dept. to his electorate. The WOMAN in charge quit and I hope slammed the door on his arse as she was leaving.
Politicians and compassion, now there's a novel idea. Before pre-selection they must pass a compassion test with the first question being, "What is compassion?". That'll weed most of them out.

Annie O, you wrote witchdoctor and I thought Bronwyn Bishop, strange don't you think? Not allowed to have a gun will keep the septics out of our beloved country. We can't chuck Brits and Poirots at people who keep Nimbys in basement cells above ground even if it is a tropical paradise.
Our History lesson for today is: What would this country be like if the first people had greeted those strange white things in floating logs with RPGs IEDs finishing with a whiff of Sarin?

River, I'm sure we'd have smuggled you in somehow. Idiots have the memory of goldfish, Census night anyone? I remember the 50s. I couldn't survive without decent coffee, Asian food, turkish delight and Baklava. Last week it was said that 3 veg and meat dinner was the best diet, old stuff but see how how the propaganda machine is starting to ramp up.

Andrew said...

Nice work. That our PM has stooped so low with this nonsense reflects very badly on us all.

JahTeh said...

Andrew, not the first time, I've just finished re-readying a book on AIDS and if you couldn't wave your little certificate screaming 'NEGATIVE', we weren't getting across our borders. Fortunately it was dumped and the idea in America of having Positive tattooed on the arm was also thrown out. I'm reading two books together, one on the politics and the other on the biology and it makes frightening reading about what the moral majority wanted to do with sick people. So here we are again doing the same thing with migrants and asylum seekers who just want to walk to a shop for food and not get shot doing it. I love the way our Gov is protecting us by not letting children roll down the grass on Parliament House, now that's what I call 'tough' law. I wouldn't let a kid walk past me now without a quick check on those backpacks.

Have a nice holiday and tell R not to trust kids, proper little terrorists they are.