Monday, January 07, 2013

Three days down

Three days at the Alfred hospital and again tomorrow unless she goes quietly into that dark night.
I never write the old girl off, she's a fighter but this time she might just be too tired to get off the ropes.
First morning phone call from the hospital was to ask about a NRO as she had gone down hill during the night. Any further down and she would be transferred to ICU and palliative care.
Call Doc Marvin who was upset that the hospital had not informed him of her condition and he had no idea she was at the Alfred.
Call Director of Nursing at the Home and tell her while mentally telling her to suck it up bitch, hope this fucks your day.
Call sister who simply cannot face coming with me, fair enough.
Call nurse who drove me there yesterday who dissolved in tears.
Call taxi and don't ever expect me to diss Sikh drivers. I've had two today who were the most gracious and kind men.
Get to hospital and mother is looking pale and interesting but breathing still and ask if I could brush her false teeth. I told her she was a pain in the butt and I would brush them but I wouldn't put my hand in her mouth for quids.
This family never has a drama with humour.  We are weird.
In the last three days, I have dived out of an ambulance, left the house with my reading glasses on and no knickers, next might be TMI for Andrew, stupid fluid tablets means putting in a panty liner in case I can't find a toilet in a hurry.  In a hurry I put it in sticky side up and that's a painful way to give yourself a Brazillian.
I photographed the BOH with mum, lovely image for him to remember. She was good since I had just given her some lunch and she wasn't labouring to breathe.
Infectious Disease Control arrived to tell me not to worry about blood germs or urine germs and they think they have the cellulitis germs under control. 
Oh Yeah, nothing to worry about, Yippee but bug control only concentrates on bugs not on lungs, heart, kidneys and whatever else is disintegrating.
So after an ultra sound on bladder and kidneys, she was exhausted, ready to sleep and I left.
She was fantastic holding on to a full bladder for two hours until the scan and I kept her company.  The minute she went round the corner I was at the ladies and taking a weight off my mind. I just couldn't sit there comfortable while she wasn't.
Thank you Bwica for the phone call while I was on my way in.
Thank you Antikva for you offer to catch a bus from Bendigo to help me but I can fall out of an ambulance all on my own.
Thanks Elephant's child for the email.
Aunt Patty has been calm but sad.  
Aunt Selma, there is a special place in Hell for you, bitch.
Okay, everything off my mind, I will now go and self medicate with a large orange and poppyseed muffin, followed by a coffee muffin followed by ice-cream or a combination of all three in a bowl.

8 comments:

Elephant's Child said...

You do self-medicate well. Let me know if you want the Xmas cake for variety (and it is only slightly bigger than a cup cake).
My eyes are crossed thinking of your Brazillion - and keeping your mother company with a full bladder is a truly amazing gesture.
Your mother sounds to be a very, very tough old girl. I have everything crossed for you all.

River said...

Ouch on the self induced Brazilian! I'm stinging just thinking about it.
I like your self medication methods too. Mine usually involve hot, hot coffee and icecream one following the other, but in no particular order.
I agree with Elephant's Child that your mum is a tough old girl and she may very well hang on for a bit longer. It was lovely of you to get a photo of BOH and your Mum. I hope the next few days go peacefully, whatever happens. Sending love your way.

Fen said...

I don't work far from the Alfred, if you need someone to ramble at or drink coffee with or a distraction, hit me up.

R.H. said...

oh my goodness.

Pants said...

Dear lovely Coppy

I feel for you so much. You're still exceptionally funny, and I hope that wonderful ability you have is sustaining you in this tough time.

Thinking of you with love.

Pants

Helen said...

Been there just a couple of months ago.. thinking of you Witchy.

JahTeh said...

EC, tough she is only because as she said today, she's not dying before her bitch of a sister. You keep tempting me with that cake, I'm weak, send it.

River, it's not the first time I've done this and it really makes the eyes water.
I love Affogato, hot coffee over ice-cream, delicious.

Fen, if you work that close to the Alfred, make a trip just for the coffee and cake bar. The willpower I've had to exert this week and only because the old girl couldn't share it with me.

You said it, Robbert.

Thanks Pants, when she does go and even Sherman tanks eventually fall apart, I won't have any regrets about what I could have done.

Middle Child said...

I haven't read the latest posts yet so I don't know how it all turns out - hope you are okay