I am sick of my mother!

Isn't this great for an elderly indoor cat.  The Bear would love one that jutted right out of the kitchen into the apple tree.  The birds wouldn't but would probably catch on and stand on the top and make faces at him.

You can see from the size of this bead that it's designed to go on a Pandora bracelet.  I just wouldn't have the control or the patience to manipulate the various coloured glass to make it.  My hands are barely able to open a chocolate box without injury.

This is also a bead, a focal bead, the centre of a necklace.  We have the moon, stars and a swirling sea and more than a truck load of talent to do this.

 

 

 

 

Mother is sick again and I don't care a fig.  I was down there for three hours yesterday but she waited until a friend of our came in after I left to go into a decline.  The friend is more sympathetic than I am these days.  Mother said she hid how ill she was from me because she didn't want to worry me, what BS.  As though I haven't spent the last 10 years just judging how ill she is by just watching her but she had all her minions running around after her and ringing Doc Marvin. I was rung by the friend last night and had a report which was nothing like the phone call from mother this morning.  I am worried for the friend since she has become a target of a nasty at the Home who made comments up the line that she does so much for mother that her daughters must feel pushed out.  Bwahahahahaha!
I'm constantly telling her not to fall for the old bat's manipulations but she's kind and says she doesn't mind.  Sister is popping in this afternoon for her usual 5 minutes but I've warned her so she's going to try and get hold of the nursing notes and see what the medication is.  It's not infection, it's just the usual heart not functioning enough to pump out fluid collecting in the lungs.  But believe me she'll hang on until next Saturday when she turns 85.  That could have been my breaking point yesterday when she  said something about her birthday and added that it was only 5 years then until she was 90 and she might make it yet. 
 That's serious, look how fast this year is going, it's March tomorrow.

Awesome

BEST ANTI-TERRORIST SQUAD AVAILABLE.

Back soon, going to the Doc's. I'm sick of feeling sick.

Probably just my mother draining off my life energy every full moon.

Size 12 concrete blocks

I saw this and immediately thought of River and Angel always trying to sit on the keyboard.  Mind you knowing cats, they would expect you to put the laptop on the cat bed and let them have the desk.

I am hurting again.  I folded up all the washing yesterday, bent down to pick up the washing basket while turning around, you know like chewing gum and walking at the same time.  Perhaps I just had a hangover from watching Darcy Bussell's ballet programme on SBS and thought I was still graceful in my largeness.  Graceful, maybe, ballerina balance, zero.  I went down like a sack of spuds.

Unlike last time when I'd waxed my feet and slid across the carpet to land gently flat on my back, this time I knew if I tried to get up I'd really hurt myself.  Bite the bullet and ring 000 again, oh the embarrassment, again.  First slide on bum to the folded clothes and put a dress on since I'd planned to shower and wash my hair so was still in night dress at 4 in the afternoon.

They rang back 3 times to see how I was because I said it wasn't urgent, I was an experienced sitter on all surfaces and wasn't harmed.  Last time they brought just the little pump up cushion, this time it looked like a life raft off the Costa Concordia. I slide over and the ginormous thing does its job and I feel like Titanic rising out of the depth in Clive Cussler's book.  I stood up and walked to my chair, no problem. The ambo said it was for people much bigger than me, thank you, says I. 

Of course I fell on the side where I'd ripped off the toenail last week, where I'd scratched the leg last week and now had carpet burn down the thigh. They asked if I was dizzy when I fell.  No, I just need another two sizes on my feet to balance the arse and learn to do one thing at a time, like turn first, then bend to pick up.  The BOH when he finds out will be round here to put a seat belt on the treadmill.  I walk okay on that, I'm holding on.  Walking to the shop this morning was sedate and close to every fence so I figured that was my exercise for today.  That and keeping two steps ahead of the breakdown that's chasing me. 

I'm my own Valentine

Aurora on Ice 
 Image Credit & Copyright:  Stéphane Vetter (Nuits sacrées)
 
 This is a fisheye view of ice and sky photographed at Jokulsarlon Beach, southeast Iceland on February 1st.
The 22 degree lunar halo was created by ice crystals in high, thin clouds refracting the light from an almost full moon.  The aurora was triggered by the earth's magnetosphere and wind from a coronal hole near the Sun's south pole.  Jupiter is visible to the left, just beyond the lunar halo.

I want a glass paperweight exactly like this, it looks fantastic.  Life has interrupted my vow to blog more regularly, like cleaning up still.  I've finished 6 months of ironing but left the board up to press the seams of two new nightdresses.  Bad move, staggered out in the dark to open the back door for the cat and kicked my little toenail completely off.  I didn't notice the hanging off nail until I woke up two hours later but fortunately I was sleeping with my feet out of the covers and didn't bleed on the sheets.  Later on I scratched my leg on the sharp handle of the washing basket and that bled everywhere.

Then there was the incident with the black spider crawling out of my dress on the bed.  That's creepy not knowing if it was in the bed, in the dress I had just taken off or was just wandering around. It didn't help that the dress was mainly black and I just noticed movement out of the corner of my eye. It ran under the bed but I sprayed it on the run.

And last night, wow, last night.  Thunderstorms don't bother me, I like watching the lightning but I swear it was right above my house last night.  Three huge crashes that nearly gave me a heart attack, sent the Bear's eyes spinning and rattled the windows.  Now I have lemons all over the backyard but I can't go out yet because the Lorikeets are in the apple tree for breakfast.  I like the dumbness of a white cat the size of a polar bear hiding in bright green grass waiting for a bird to land near him.  The Lorikeets just move higher up and spit apple at him. 

I've filled two bags for collection and have started on a third but I so object to being told what I can and cannot fill the bags with. I'm very bad and fill black garbage bags and tie the collection bag around the top. If it was the charity the bags were going to I'm be more inclined to put in the good stuff but all of this goes to the big collecting companies and they are making a profit so let them sort through.

My $2 Emporium is closing. I can't believe it, 20 years I've been buying great stuff in there and they're going.  Southland probably has put up the rent 200%.  I must get back there next week and buy some good plain glasses for my painting and look for a good vase or two. Glass pebbles and aluminium pans and plastic bags for beads. I loved that shop.  I hate change.

Do it Yourself.

I just had to share this with the gardeners who blog and that wouldn't be me.  Mosaic stepping stones done the easy way.  Put the broken pieces of your trinkets and crockery face down in a cake pan and put the cement over the top and let set.  No, I don't know how much cement or how to get it out of the cake pan but when I was mulling this over, I happened to walk past a $2 emporium and they had aluminium turkey  roasting pans and not expensive.  Brilliant, let the step set and just rip the pan to shreds. Smaller steps for a border around a little garden could be done the same way. I have the crockery, I don't have the cement but one day my garden will dazzle. Well, part of it will.  The water meter is disappearing into the ground so a little border around that is a good starter.  The glass pebbles can be bought from the $2 shop in different sizes.

Going well on the treadmill. That old saying about a watched pot never boils is also true about the timer on a treadmill.  I find that if I close my eyes and go into a slightly meditative state, not too much I have to mind the feet - lift, stride, fast and repeat - then open the eyes sometimes I've been walking for 10 minutes and the green buttons have gone around a full lap.  Burnt up 28 calories this morning.
The only problem is that walking around Southland is like walking without a safety net and my balance is still crapola. Thank you to nice door man at JBHiFi who grabbed my arm when I tripped and nearly ended up in a '50 shades of grey' embrace when I turned to thank him and tripped again. Some days I shouldn't be let outside at all.

The Bear is sitting on the treadmill beside me, 4.23 is food time.  I am resisting the temptation to turn on the machine, really resisiting.  Damn he read my mind and is sitting by the door.

February is the new "New Year"

It's taken all of January to kick in and I'm still not right.  Mother is back to normal, manipulating anyone she can con.  Not me, I do what's necessary and no more.  My sister is consistant, a half hour visit and she leaves at speed. She's enjoying retirement, meditation classes, painting classes and lunching. Apparently I don't retire until mother does. I can barely look at her or speak on days I go down before I'm ready.  I just can't get past that week of dying when she decided not to, right on the top step of that Highway to Heaven.  She's now planning her 85th birthday, 6th of March, I'm planning on opening a vein.

Since I decided I wouldn't go there if I didn't want to, I've been throwing out piles of papers going back to 2006, science marches on. I've found things I thought I'd lost, writings I really wanted to keep and my new will which I could have sworn was put away with my other important papers.  I've ripped up love letters, where did I find such boring blokes but every now and then I still find traces of the ex. That's really exciting, do I rip it up or burn it?  I've just found another load of papers in the study and then there are the bank statements and 2013 accounts to be done to death. 150 craft magazines are now just a few pages in three folders, craft, jewellery and Christmas. Articles from New Scientist also whittled down to really interesting blog fodder in another small folder.  Christmas cards and rubbish brought from the Home when I thought she was going added to the recycle bin. I deny everything when she says "do you know what happened......"  The recycle bin has been so heavy some weeks that I've nearly overturned me taking it out.  The red bin hasn't been much better. I'm sure it's totally illegal to shove a toaster oven in it but I did.

I'm typing here in the company of my treadmill which is being used every day.  I'm up to 7 minutes twice a day, a little over 200 metres and burning off 20 calories in the process.  I'm not so much interested in losing weight as building up the muscles in my legs to offset the nerve damage in my feet where my balance is losing the battle.
The coffee table arrived from my sister and it is big big big.  I haven't decided where to move it, not until I finish vac'ing the rest of the carpet.  It's amusing the Bear to sit underneath it and look up through the glass.  It has one drawback, it smells of cigarette smoke, it's in the wood so I'm looking for orange oil furniture polish to see if that might fix it.
The chair is half a success.  The cushion is not working out, too hard, says Redylocks.  So we've decided to go for a half feather, half foam softer one.  There's no doubt ye olde fat bum would have crushed it down in time but it was putting pressure on my spine.  On the other hand, it is so nice to just stand up and walk away instead of these new lounge chairs that need a built in crane.  The Bear likes it.

And and and I've finished the ironing begun 6 months ago.  Right down to the sheets from mother's house that was sold 5 years ago.  Lovely thick Egyptian cotton which will be made into pillow cases in the near future.  It's the type of cotton that wears into softness the longer you use it.  I also got away with the Actil (made in Australia!)single sheet set, very pretty and she didn't use it because it was cold, good, no memories.  It will make a lovely night dress and frilled pillow cases. My sister didn't miss out, she grabbed all the pillow cases and the duck down doona at the same time.

Now I have a choice for the rest of the afternoon, finish off a present for mother to give next week and must be finished by tomorrow or, courtesy of Miss O'Dyne, finish reading the marvellous book about Georges the elegant department store which was trashed by Sydney's David Jones after they bought it.  Well, Sydney, what could you expect!  I'll just take another pill and make a decision.