Friday, December 23, 2011

The Christmas hurt

Christmas Graphics

I don't usually hurt myself until Boxing Day  but I started early this year.  Yesterday I walked to the bus and walked Southland and realized how out of condition I am. 
So I decided to walk to the bus again today to see mother, drop off sister's present and the BOH's.  I mean this is my sister, wrap the present, take it down to the Home so she can pick it up on Christmas Day after her hospital shift and this is after I've walked Southland to buy it.  To top it off, I rolled up and signed in at 12.30, noting that she had signed in at 11.20 except I had misread the time and we were both there together so it was rip-tear the paper and toss the bow aside.  Lovely perfume, yummy, thank you Mum. I have dibs on the Estee gold box. 
Where was I about the hurting part?  Strange dream this morning, very strange since the house was clean and devoid of furniture.  My mobile phone was ringing and I was searching everywhere for it.  Light bulb goes off, it's on the beside table and I roll over to get it. I'm still dreaming, remember. And I promptly fall out of bed straight down on my knees. Boy, did I wake up then. Apart from the pain in the knees, I was so lucky not to have smacked my chin on the side table. I must have been right on the edge of the bed and the turning over dumped me on the floor. 
I want applause for still walking to the bus, very slow walking but walking.  Made it on to the bus, made it off without pain only to trip on the only tile in the newsagent that was slightly out of line with the others. Not to worry the counter broke my fall.  Managed to get to the next shop and buy two gorgeous dark crimson reindeer in a matte finish with gold antlers.  Out of that shop safely only to be almost run down crossing the road by two little old ladies in the most enormous black 4x4. I swear the one driving could barely see above the steering wheel. They looked like two kids who'd swiped Dad's car.  Even the bloke beside me blasphemed a Christmas message as the wheels nearly took his feet off.
Now I'm home, I'm staying home, you couldn't even get me to the pub after today and that's a first for me.


JahTeh said...

If anyone is strolling through Myer or David Jones, get to the perfume counter and spritz yourself with the new $145 Balenciaga perfume. Divine.

Elephant's Child said...

Much applause from here. An amazing effort. And I love your graphics (as usual). Have a wonderful, peaceful Christmas.

Jayne said...

I am staying glued to the chair.
They are insane out there.
Whips, chains, chairs, tasers and electric cattle prods wouldn't get me venturing out amidst that crazy mob.
Otherwise....have a lovely 25th, Coppy!

River said...

Balenciaga? Writing that down....

You seem to more than usually accident prone this month JahTeh, you'd better sit still with your feet up for a day or three.

Have a very peaceful Christmas.

Anonymous said...

Mind if I pass on the perfume? Maybe Sedgers will lend me some of his Old Spice. Only kids fall out of bed. You are reliving childhood.

JahTeh said...

EC, no problems, get the oldies pissed at Christmas lunch then nick off. That might not be as easy as it sounds, they got through an astounding amount of grog at the Christmas party.

Jayne, one of the nurses has relatives from Hungary and her husband took them to Chadstone. They've never seen anything like it and would you believe they came here expecting a Koala up every tree, in the 21st Century!

River, they like to spray it on those fiddly little cards but tell them that you take a lot of medication and it has to go on your skin to get the full effect. And look as though you have $145 to throw away on perfume.

Andrew, if R was a perfume he would be Balenciaga, you, on the other hand would be Brut. As for MiLord, he's old and he is spicy and I wouldn't let him anywhere near my nekkid skin.
I bet you've fallen out of a few beds in your time.

iODyne said...

I'd bet he has too.
'the counter broke my fall. Managed to get to the next shop '

in between 'fall' and 'managed' you left out the part where the shop offered their $5m Public Risk Insurance Policy to compensate you shock, trauma, injury, etc. FFS

yes as El Chi said, your illustration is just gorgeous.
Wishing you PEACE JOY and GOODWILL

JahTeh said...

A happy day to you too Stacks and the crossword scratchie I went in to buy was a bust as well.

R.H. said...

Wishing you PEACE JOY and SCANDAL

Middle Child said...

Jesus Mary and Joseph, someone who trips and rolls out of bed more often that I do. Unbelievable.