While I was walking

Yes, me walking to the bus and thinking. Kind neighbour asking if I wanted a lift when I was practically on the bus stop, thank you not since you passed me leaving home and then 20 mins away from the bus. Where was I, ah thinking and I don't think well on my feet but this was good. I've been looking at treadmills, go on, roll around screaming with laughter, but all of them are too big for the small space I have left. I'm still the custodian of BOH's furniture, clothes and kitchen stuff so there's only one small part of the study and these damn machines don't look big until you get one in the house. What I need is a walking treadmill, no running room because there's no way I'll run anytime soon, but a small square walk pad, handles and simple control, 2 speeds, walk and crawl.
Why hasn't someone thought of this for old people, fat people and people who fall over gumnuts on footpaths? If I buy a treadmill, it's weight has to go up to 150kgs which I think is dumb because that's for running, I'm thinking crawl here and they're damned expensive. I don't need an incline button, I don't need a clock ticking away my heart attack only two handrests so I don't fall off and a square foot pad. I could do 30 mins 3 times a day just doing a slow walk and put in optional extra, a book rest. All this thinking and I didn't fall over once.

I haven't walked to the bus in quite some time and it was interesting to see changes. Little house on the corner just sold for $600,000, not much room on the block, corner block though and only 3 bedrooms and one bathroom. First owner was one of those manic house proud lunatics who laid the breakfast table before going to bed at night and threw the kids out of bed at dawn to have the bedrooms perfect before the school run. No lace curtains, just drapes pulled back to show the immaculate housekeeping. Bitch. I had photos on the blog somewhere showing the fantastic Wisteria over the arched front gate which the current owners have cut down.  Speaking of Wisteria, I left my camera at home as usual and I came across another lych gate with Pink Wisteria. I've never seen Pink Wisteria before only the purple stuff. I defer to River and Elephant's Child to tell me that it really exists. It means another walk with the camera to catch it but considering the wind today there'll be no blossoms left this week.

So around the corner from the white house, the storm had brought down a branch from a flowering gum. This tree was in a garden and it's been there for over 40 years but one branch and it wasn't a big branch considering the tree, knocked out the corner of two houses. Tiles off and guttering down and both over bedrooms, didn't take down the fence but cracked off the wood in places. When it flowers it's always full of lorikeets and I used to stop and watch them, up close and personal.
Around the next corner and another house sold. Almost the same layout as mine but on a slightly bigger block and has a garage, no garden (at least I have ivy) $664,000 for this one. I hope the ex trawls the home sale pages and sees these.

And the bus, another sadist driver not dropping the door but enjoyed watching me do Tarzan to get in. Myki wasn't working as usual, at the front, so I made sure I exited the same way and didn't pay.
Next driver was kinder and edged the bus right up to the footpath in Mentone, so much better but my knees still felt like they'd been struck with hammers.  Then I caught my arm in the handle of the door to the surgery and nearly broke it when the door slammed shut. Don't ask me how it happened, I was in too much other pain to notice.  Doc Marvin is satisfied with BGL, much better than last year.  If I go off the blood pressure and diabetic pills, nothing will happen now but maybe a stroke in a few years. I asked if that would happen before the heart attack and breakdown and he thought maybe all at once knowing how I never do things by halves. He did explain why the Diabetes mob continue to change the rules. They take a control group and study them, usually a mixture of good and bad conditions then make changes. Shame my diabetes educator doesn't read the memos about one size not fitting all and listens to me instead of talking at me. Bloody Doc is still laughing at her not knowing the difference between non-alcoholic ginger beer and writing me up as a drunk.

I ended the day with mother, again, still, evermore.

Looking backwards.

I've been going through the cds of images from 2005 and beyond and found this, an oldie but a goodie and it's still relevant. There's just a lot more of me dragging than there was and I have definitely snapped.
I did have good taste in men, though I don't recall from where I downloaded so many naked bods and surprise, so many have green eyes. I really have to do something about that fixation.

As to snap, sister rang to say she dreamed of going to mother's funeral last night and the eulogy was given by a Catholic nun who did a lovely job. She even remembered the nun's name. I, on the other hand had more of a nightmare.  My ex daughter-in-law moved into the house because she was getting re-married. She swanned around boasting of how much weight she'd lost (bitch) but every time I looked at her face she turned into Rose Porteous - without the billions. I wasn't impressed by the fact that she was scooping up my jewellery to wear on her head. If I'd have known I was going to dream this, I'd have stitched her a burlap bag.

A whining visit to Doc Marvin is on for tomorrow.  This time in 2012 he gave me a year to drop some weight, it hasn't happened, I'm-up-way-up-heart-attack-up if the nervous breakdown doesn't get me first. And they're running neck and neck so far.  An article in the paper yesterday blames stress as one cause of women not being able to lose weight. I'll go along with that. Two of the happiest years of my life came just after the divorce before mother threw her tentacles around me again. I didn't even notice losing 20 kgs, I was having so much fun running my own life.  Now I'm back to eating my way out of the prison of daughter in waiting and the combined diabetes educator and her rules and regulations about food.  I've been through 3 shrinks, 1 psychologist, 1 hynotherapist and a dietician. That poor dear was newly qualified and could barely tolerate the fat objects she was supposed to be helping. I bet she went on to be a life long food avoider.
Anyway there's not much I don't know about myself and the inner workings of my mind and the mind is off the tracks heading for the gorge with the bridge out and no Skippy to send for help.

My stars said that today I should not indulge in a spending spree because of depression as no good would come of it. If only I'd read them before I went to ebay.  Stupid astrology, doesn't it know that the thought that a goodie will magically appear in the letterbox at some stage during the week keeps me from staying under the bed permanently.  And where's spring, I'm bloody freezing.
 

A new look.

I thought it might be time for a new spring look. I'm worried even the bird looks worried. I'm not sure that I have the letters large enough to read but I'm sure I'll deal with that. It was a calming background not so in your face purple and I hope you lot appreciate that it's taken me nearly three hours to fix these colours in between panic attacks about losing the entire blog. I did download the old template but I'll give this one a chance.

Step away from the "Buy" button.

Aren't they just divine, gorgeous, luscious?  Step away from the "Buy" button??  It was never going to happen the longer I looked deep into these earrings.  Pierced, of course, but the back is flat enough to take a glued on clip arrangement which will turn them upside down and I'm ready to wear. You never know, I might go somewhere in one of my two green velvet dresses and I'll need these.
What would my life be without jewells, boring that's what.
Thanks to the ever helpful Miss O'Dyne who signed me up to Pinterest, I've just spent an hour and a half watching a slide show of lovely jewellery, not on that site though.  Since I first set up a computer in 2005, I've downloaded images of everything that interested me but I haven't kept them on the computer, I've put them all on CDs.  All on a master then on CDs in categories. I've only watched the jewell one and considering my memory hasn't been the best lately, I'm surprised at how many of them I could recall names of and ownership, we just won't mention how many ownerships are mine.
Pinterest looks interesting and once I get the hang of moving around I'm sure I'll enjoy every time wasting minute. Not time wasting, I should say educational experience and learning also calming instead of downing tranqs and Gin as the good ship Mother keeps sailing through my life.

I'm back in Kansas

My house is still standing although the phone line took a battering. Thanks to Telstra being helpful, it's now back online but I'm not telling anyone that yet especially mother. Telstra routed the landline calls through my mobile phone so I wasn't completely cut off, I just let everyone think that for some peace and quiet.
120kmh winds through here two days in a row. The backyard is littered with buckets,  chairs and boxes and they're wet so I'm not picking them up yet. The small branches of the gum tree came down but not the whole tree. Usually I don't mind the wind in the trees, it reminds me of a surf beach and I can go to sleep dreaming of that but this time all I could picture where those photos of lighthouses on the edge of nothing with waves heading for the light on top. The street didn't lose power which surprised me.
Mother heard the storm so she told me as I staggered down to the Home after a no sleep night. She has recovered from the lung rot and is doing well. Bloody terrific, I'm down a hole so deep I can see stars in day time. I keep telling you that she won't go until she figures a way to take me with her and the way I am now, I'll go first.  No arthritis pills for two days and I can barely hit these keys without moaning. I had to get the girl in the pharmacy to crack the childproof lid for me so I could take them at Southland. It's the knuckles across the right hand, burning and swollen and that's the hand that gets whacked because it's the one that hurts, Murphy's Law.
The great and useless IceBear was not frightened of the wind, not at all. Of course he never ventured from the fire to check it out except once when a load of water was dumped on top of him from the tree he was under. I swear his feet never touched carpet until he was on the bed and rolling on my doona cover to dry off. Cracking the tops on his cans of food isn't a load of laughs either.
And something else that hurts, using the remote control for the TV. I just have to calm down whenever politics hit the screen and take my time removing the offending politician from my sight (all sides).
I did enjoy Julia's interview though. She could have dumped a bin load of crap on all of them but didn't and I will buy her book when it's finished.
Phone is ringing, shame I'm here and it's out there. I'll ring the old girl later, much later, maybe next week.