Saturday, September 22, 2007


It was the dead of night until the gutter crawler dropped the stainless steel turkey roaster he was nicking from my pile of rubbish.
Perhaps I should have put a note on the huge stainless steel preserving pan to warn people that it was used for ten years of lace dyeing but it's steel so I suppose they won't poison themselves.
The spray arm from the old dishwasher went the first day.
And I don't think the broken ladder had time to hit the ground before it disappeared.

There's satisfaction in going out in the morning and noticing the pile has been reduced to a few items.

Tomorrow I'll put out all the little things children love to take home to mother.
Then I'll celebrate my junk-free zone.


Davoh said...

The turkey roaster creeps cautiously,
Stainless steel slints in the moonlight.
Zoroaster slides.

Oops, must b pssd, can't remember the number of syllables ... drat, must b losin' it.

Time to go. Find a muse.

Brian Hughes said...

It could have been worse. He could have been nicking your undies from your laundry basket and selling them on e-bay. I know that's what Sedgwick used to do with my undies. The weird thing was, though, they never actually turned up for sale anywhere, and I've often wondered about the sudden increase in his homemade handkerchiefs collection.

JahTeh said...

Davo, the cars haven't stopped crawling by all day and that was a musing.

Hughes, summer and the camping season is just around the corner so I never hang my undies where unscrupulous vagabonds can nick them and sell them off as holiday flats.

JahTeh said...

What I said about the small things, I dragged a 1975 Kriesler TV out there today. I was doing alright until I hit the grass.

Lord Sedgwick said...

"sell them off as holiday flats."

... or as the septics have been known to refer to your undies, "holiday condom-minimums".

As for Hughes' missing undies, fantasise as he might, we aren't into anything related to bonsai vegetation.

Until we reread your post with our gold plated 20-60x zoom spotting Bolle binocliars on we read it that you were chucking out a stainless steel turkey baster.

We thought to ourself, "if the ole Copper does that then, where's Cameraface's next niece/nephew coming from?"

Anonymous said...

I bet the pile is not half as big as it ought to be.

JahTeh said...

Hell's bells, Sedgwick, I got to holiday condom and choked. I must remember to read faster in future.

Andrew, you should have seen the nature strip the year the ex left me. His junk, including his beloved hub caps from his Toyota and his wooden swords from Fiji, his wine racks. I loved the sound of pilferers in the morning especially when it was his crap being nicked.

Brian Hughes said...

That wasn't a fantasy, Sedgwick. You were in such a hurry to steal them you left your signature skidmarks behind.

Middle Child said...

ha ha ha ha... I am one of those 9much to my daughters' shame who loves to trawl the streets apres darke to look inside skip bins and street rubbish... I just have to...can't help myself... found some real treasures and garbage too.

david santos said...

Very good posting, thank you.

Ann ODyne said...

Bobby Duvall says: - "I love the smell of pilferers in the morning".

that 1975 Kriesler was probably a collectible - you'll next see it for sale in Greville St at $250

iODyne said...

I've just been reading The Guardian

hope the link