Hard to think, it must be Christmas

Yes, stupid Christmas coming right up my bumper.
No problems about where I'll be for the lunch and post lunch will be the local pub.
Now there are a few things before I forget.

One: watch handling the kettle, the same one I haven't cleaned since I set it on fire, but it got its revenge by falling on the floor full of boiling water. No slippers, bare feet, no dressing gown, thin nightdress. Fortunately I jumped back as it hit the floor and only copped some on the foot, a bit up the thigh and my little finger. Threw off the nightie and jumped straight into a warm shower.
I still haven't cleaned the kettle.

Two: Has anyone had an email from a stranger who asks to be your latitude friend? I had 3 of these, the latitude is given as the same as mine and is a google feature. I've never heard of it, is it a facebook thing? He's been thrice deleted.

Three: I going away for the weekend. I'm staying out overnight, in a hotel and it has a bar. Given the price of cocktails these days, I won't be getting wasted. I might even have to smuggle in my own Bombay Sapphire disguised as Evian Water. I finally get to use my overnight luggage with the handle and the wheelies and my travel umbrella. My travel dreams of going to England for a Hindu/English wedding where the guests were being transported to the reception by horse and carriage was bombed by a mother crisis. I must remember to hide diary and journal considering the remarks about family and BOH's girlfriend.

Four: Mother is in a lot of pain in the left arm, mastectomy arm. Doc Marvin has told her it's nerve pain from arthritis but it could be something else. She's not asking, we're not asking or telling if we do ask so she's floating along on a cloud of morphine. She must feel better as she was out to lunch yesterday while I was home eating a baked bean sandwich. Sister wants to bring in a pain expert which is fine by me but she's dismissed Doc Marvin and the D.O.N of the nursing home and says she'll make the arrangements first. Colour me stupid but shouldn't it be discussed with the doc and the d.o.n first? Polite, yes? She actually forbade me to say anything to either of these people who are doing their best for the old girl. And to top it off, she tells me to make a list of when mum's conditions (all of them?) started and what medication she's taking.
Riiiiiight, not a chance, I'm, that's right ME is going to say NO. For a start I don't know what medication she's on because the account from the pharmacy uses the real name of the drugs not the brand name.

Five: I had a night out on the 12th November with her and the BOH and the girlfriend. I was told beforehand that it wasn't going to be an early night which was great for me, I had a ride home, no taxi drama and I knew everyone there. I haven't photos yet but when they lit the bbq, 10 kookaburras lined up along the fence and they don't mind that the place is vegetarian, they'll eat anything and they even endure the human patting that went on, all for food.
So I'm happy in my special chair that doesn't require a crane to haul me out of, enjoying the slide show, not drinking but I really couldn't avoid the maryjane haze from the 3 uni students beside me and up comes sister and says we're leaving. It's 10 p.m. ffs but she's drunk all her cans from the chill bag, bored with the slides, didn't like one of the uni girls who she said was going to get aggressive from the MJ she was smoking and was going NOW. So I was home by 11.30 watching a movie and wondering why in the hell I didn't smack her in the mouth and stay until my usual 2 a.m. departure. It took a damn lot for me to go in the first place, I haven't been anywhere since the last time I was there in March and she ruined it. I really need some assertiveness training. I should have known when she made a snotty remark before I'd even left home. So I 've spent a week cutting out things for ma's Christmas cards and the floor looks like snow, big deal. I'll vac when I'm finished and that includes washing her son's clothes as well.


Six: I don't have depression, at least not enough to take the anti-depressant medication Doc Marvin gave me. It takes 3 weeks for the good times to kick in but 3 days in and I was thinking, if it's this bad to get on them what kind of Hell is it to get off them. I just upped my anti-anxiety tabs to two and I'm feeling better. In fact, I realize just how hard I've been doing life by trying to stay on one tablet. The blood glucose was levelling until sister stress started on me so now it's all over the place again. But I'm not depressed, just a little down from stress eating two blocks of chocolate but at least I didn't drink an entire chill bag of beer.

Seven: So while I was trying to blog and procrastinating by tidying up around the computer (hoping to find a dropped $50 note) I found this, it has a date on the back from last December but I don't remember it at all still an appropriate time to find it.
*I am responsible for the thoughts I think and the things that I choose to pay attention to and my actions that follow..it's only a thought!
* My emotional well-being is more important than everyone else's bad behaviour.
*My emotional well-being depends on remaining true to my deepest core values.

Eight: I will be out of my comfort zone for two days.
Overmedicating on pills and Bombay Sapphire worked for Hemmingway until he shot
himself.
Sometime between now and never, I fully intend to flatten my sister.