AND FROM RIVER, THE EXPLANATION

I'll go along with that.

IT'S THE CIRCLE SEASON AGAIN

Lucy Pringle has photographs on the new season's crop circles. I particularly like this one of a dragon fly.
Some circles are amateurish, some intricate enough to qualify for their 'ufo' status and some, in past years, have been done as advertising.
They look brilliant from the air but messy on the ground. Lucy Pringle studies the electro-magnetic properties of the trampled ground along with other researchers and the debunkers of all things 'mystical'.
If they're all done by planks strapped to the feet of pranksters then I'm very impressed with their precision and artistry.

I'LL TAKE A QUART OF SYMPATHY

Just in case you lot think my stress is just a minor glitch in my life plan.

I sat down this afternoon to finally sew up the hems on my new dresses which have been hanging on the wardrobe door for three weeks now.

Thread the needle, tension's fine, foot to the pedal.

Nothing, nada, no response. I can't believe it. The machine's just been repaired.

My feet are pedalling like crazy and nothing's moving.

Oh, I see, my feet are pedalling like crazy.

My electric machine sits on the old treadle machine and there are the feet, treadling away like crazy.

Pathetic, honestly.

I'M LIVING A DOUBLE LIFE

It didn't take long for ArseholesGasLimited to send out the confirmation letter for the increase in mother's direct debit. Two days as a matter of fact, so why haven't they still got my P of A after a month?

Mother is sick, urinary tract infection and is now on antibiotics so hopefully the hallucinations will slowly go away or fastly, bit hard to tell with her neural network.

What she's told the Bouvier sisters about me won't go so quickly. I really might have to belt one or both at the funeral.

So while I'm organising all the financial and health details of the old girl, I fail to look closely at mine. AGL didn't take my direct debit for gas out of my last pension or this one. Fortunately I got a cheery soul at the call centre and I didn't have the heart to rip his out. The direct debits are still being taken out on that end but it hasn't shown up on the bank balance.

Never mind Marlborough, around here it's Kafka Country.

TODAY IS.....

29th of May, 2009 and on the 29th of April, 2009 I faxed my Power of Attorney and the two AGL accounts I am supposed to have access to.

The call centre IN ADELAIDE hasn't been notified.

Would I fax through the PofA again?

It's already cost $6 of my pension to do this once but says nice call centre person, "we will give you a credit on the account".

Which would be fine if the call centre ever gets the faxes I'm sending there.

Now I'm going to email the file with an appropriate letter which I'm still trying to write without the blasphemies.

I'm wondering what happens if Mother drops off the twig, between them not getting the PofA and me becoming Executor of her estate.

NARACOORTE FOSSIL CAVE

The fossil cave part of the Naracoorte site is more developed than when I saw it way back when.
Information about all the caves is here .

WOW AND MORE WOW

This is the interior of Britain's biggest known cave chamber named Gaping Gill.
The main chamber is 476 feet long, 82 feet wide and 115 feet from floor to vaulted ceiling.


Cave enthusiasts were winched one by one down the gigantic pothole in Ingleborough, North Yorkshire - a descent that takes a full minute to reach the floor.


The cavern was formed by the action of a stream, Fell Beck, which flows from the flank of 2,373ft Ingleborough, the second highest mountain in the Yorkshire Dales, on to limestone rocks and roars down a dizzying 360ft drop in a natural fault line which makes it Britain's highest unbroken waterfall - twice the height of Niagara.

SPECTROSCOPY AND PIGMENTS

I've blogged about using RAMAN spectroscopy to analyze ancient Mayan paint pigments here .

Professor Vandenabeele also used this method at another Mayan site in Yucatan. The little know temple complex of Ek'Balam which variously translates as 'Black Jaguar', Bright Star Jaguar' or 'Star Jaguar' is near the more famous Chichen Itza.

Thirty three samples were studied from room 23 of the acropolis, the brilliantly carved facade is shown in the image below.


These samples were analyzed using RAMAN spectroscopy and several pigments were identified.
Haematite (reddish brown), Calcite (white), Carbon (black), Cinnabar (red) and Indigo (blue).


Indigo is an inorganic dye obtained from the plant of the same name and combined with Palygorskite clay makes the famous "Maya Blue" pigment which was sacred to the Mayans and I'll bore you to tears about it in another post.

CONSERVATION OF MENNA'S TOMB

It's three posts down.

I forgot to change the date.

Blogger does not forgive mistakes.

CRACKING THE MAYAN CODE

A very interesting program to watch especially after seeing "Angels and Demons". That Church aligned with State could think of wiping out a culture by burning not only their written and illustrated books but also the thousands of Maya in what was ethnic cleansing was not just a vision of the Catholic missionaries, all conquering nations did it. The Maya had a good go at knocking themselves off in the name of religion. The miracle is that from fragments saved and temples uncovered, researchers have opened up the Mayan world for us to appreciate the wonders worked without the aid of the wheel, or it seems, 'peace in our time'.

The image above was shown in the program. It's of a high-born lady piercing her tongue with a stingray barb then pulling a thorny vine through to give her blood as an offering. David Stuart was interviewed for the show but while it made mention of one of his major breakthroughs in translating the glyphs, another wasn't mentioned.

He re-interpreted a particular symbol at Copan which had been believed to mean "blood" to mean "clouds". As the program pointed out, many symbols could mean the same but here was a

subtle refinement in regards to the offerings to the Gods.

Bloodletting, usually by the Mayan nobility or elite was regarded as the most valuable gift they could give. This aspect of Mayan culture coincided with the evolution of a highly stratified class system. It was the express duty of the nobility to perform the rituals that kept the natural and supernatural worlds in balance. The Gods bestowed life, humans returned acknowledgment of the gift.

They pierced not only tongues but earlobes and in the case of males, genitals. After the piercing, the blood dripped onto sheets of bark paper which was then burned, transformed into clouds of smoke that the Gods took in as sustenance and returned as life-giving rain. Now you can see that subtle refinement of meaning.

And if you think I would take pleasure in the thought of some bloke shoving a stingray barb through his crown jewells followed by a thorny vine, well, shame on you.

bwahahahahhahahha.

Ripper.

HUBBLE

Everyone is familiar with the other Horsehead Nebula, the one with the black horse head shape against a red cosmic cloud, but this is the Blue Horsehead Nebula in the constellation Scorpius.

The last suttle mission to keep the Hubble up and running was worth every penny/cent when we get so much information from the telescope, better than planning manned flights to Mars or building bases on the moon.

REALLY, PEOPLE!

I watched the movie "Angels and Demons" and while not a world beater, I thought it was better than the "DaVinci Code". At least Tom Hanks' forehead was able to wrinkle and express itself without the gallon of botox he had last time. Female lead, forgettable or had a badly written part or Ron Howard doesn't like women. I liked the lace on the Cardinals.

Scientists are carrying on because they say there's no way that anti-matter could be contained the way it is in the movie. See that word there, MOVIE, not real life but make believe or suspend belief. I mean no single man could take the punishment that John McLean does in "Die Hard" the franchise but who complains about that. Same thing with Harry Potter, make believe, movie, entertainment, full stop. By the way the trailer for HP and the Half Blood Prince looks like the movie will be a ripper.

Moving on, I went to the early session and there were very few people in the theatre but they couldn't have made more of a pigsty of the place if they tried. I'd like to thump the bloke who left his popcorn packet (large) right in the middle of the steps going out, couldn't even put in on the seat. He couldn't have put it on the carpet, his popcorn was there. He had his mobile phone on several times, lit up like a Christmas tree, so how could he possibly miss his mouth.
Same with the two birds to the right of me, the only clear space near their seats was where their feet had been.

Mobile phones to the left of me, phones to the right of me. Why can't people sit for two hours without checking to see if someone loves them or is it a test to see how much I can hate them?
The first thing I do is turn off the mobile, really turn it off. That's what I'm there for, two hours of un-interrupted motherless enjoyment. And talk, shut up to the tarts in the back row or move down to the front where 10 rows would give me a buffer zone of silence.

And how desperate do you have to be to need a pee in the middle of two hours?

Roll on July 15.

CONSERVATION OF THE TOMB

Researchers found that at least three major previous conservation treatments were inside the chapel. In 1913, Ernest MacKay replaced a number of plaster fragments and fittled the ceiling with three light iron girders.

In 1914-1915 shows the plaster fragments set into the black muna (bottom pic from Griffith Institute, Ashmolean Museum, Oxford). The top photo from 1966 shows the white repair plaster over the muna substrate to stabilize the fragments. In the 1980s/90s, polyvinyl acetate (a synthetic binder) was mixed with sand and clay to form a mortar in the existing white plaster areas. B72 (Paraloid) was also introduced to stabilize the paintings.

Over the years, the plaster and pinkish PVA had cracked becoming unstable and visually distracting. The previous fills also resulted in the creation of 'haloes' or yellow tidemarks around the losses. Samples of sand and sandstone powders were analyzed to see if they would produce adverse chemical changes in the lime plaster or with the original black muna plaster. After testing and examination with polarized light microscopy they were found safe to use. The colours of different sands were tested and a mixture of lime putty, local sandstone powder, light building sand and a local pinkish sandstone were decided on. The top photo shows the previous repairs being removed.

The loose materials of the fill have to be removed and the surface wetted with a brush to aid adhesion and to slow the drying rate. The sand and limestone putty mixture had to be applied quickly, taking care to avoid contact with the original edges.

The repairs were then cut back under light to ensure an even surface and that the mortar followed the plane of the wall. Then mortar was pushed into the edges of the original plaster to ensure good contact and mimic the original plaster surface.

It could be that in another 40 or 50 years or even less, these repairs will be removed to make way for a better conservation project. It's certain not to last the 3 thousand years the paintings have. All this stuff is probably copyright but sueing me will do you no good but since thousands read this blog, I won't charge you for the publicity.

ARCHAEOMETRY IN MENNA'S TOMB

Monash University will be hosting the 5th International Conference on Advanced Vibrational Spectroscopy in Melbourne, July 12th to 17th. One of the invited speakers is Peter Vandenabeele who is Research Professor in Archaeometry at Ghent University.

Archaeometry is the science of archaeology, using analytic chemistry, spectroscopy, (bio) organic chemistry, electrochemistry, physics, conservation science, museology, anthropology, history, history of art and archaeology. In other words all the post-Indiana Jones stuff.

The analysis of precious artefacts or art works which cannot be taken apart or damaged or even moved and micro samples of pottery and paint flakes are being undertaken by scientists using several non-invasive methods.

In 2007, Professor Vandenabeele worked on the Menna Tomb Project. Menna was a high official who served as an overseer of the Cadastral surveys during the reigns of Tuthmosis IV and Amenhotem III between 1419 - 1370 BC. His tomb at Thebes is one of the finest painted, non-Royal Egyptian tombs open to the public and the paintings decorating the walls are marvellous examples of what Egyptians could do with pigments and plaster.

The research team of scientists involved in the archeaometry phase used visual analysis techniques of colorimetry (visible, ultra-violet and near infra-red) x-ray fluorescence (XRF) and RAMAN spectroscopy. The aim was to provide a complete analysis of the organic and inorganic materials, that is, the paint pigments, varnishes, binders and plaster in the tomb. The results would show not only the ancient materials but later repairs by conservators that may be degrading the paintings.

This is the XRF machine built especially for this project. After a visual examination of the painting, points were selected for study and analysis. As all archaeometric processes work by using the effect of light wave lengths converted to spectral troughs and peaks, nothing touches the painted walls so pigments or matrix remain intact.

The x-ray fluorescence here has identified the elemental components of the sample of yellow and it's inorganic concentration. The highest peak is As (Arsenic) and the next is Ca (Calcium) with smaller concentrations of Fe(Iron) Sr (Strontium) which indicates the pigment is almost pure orpiment, an arsenic sesquisulphide (As2S3). ( don't ask what sesquisulphide is or you'll be made to google it yourself)

Preliminary findings show that the Egyptian artists worked with combinations of pigments in different mixtures, either mixed together and then applied to the wall, or laid on in washes to create transparency.

And in true Lord Hughes style, I'll be posting about the conservation of the tomb next, with photos.

I'M BECOMING A GARDENPHOBIC

There's probably a high-faluting latin word for gardenphobia but that will do.

A beautiful autumn day........in the garden.

Pray for the plants I've just put in. They were so safe in their pots until I came along.

Water crystals, hole digging, watering, back filling (gardeny term that) and I managed to drop both of them.

I think I broke their necks.

I gave up after that and sat in the sun and cleaned the brass goblets and sprayed them so I'll never have to do it again.

Now I have to hide them again.

Who wants to be reminded of their 21st birthday when they're rapidly approaching the umpty-first?

Besides the ex gave them to me. Why did I marry someone who gave me a present that I would have to clean until the day I died?

FOR POTTER FANS

This is 'Shell Cottage' from the set of 'Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows'. I think this is what I love about the films, how the setmakers (?) take words and make them into visions. I want it.

MORE BIREFRINGENCE

Katrina Putker's image of a dinner plate and cutlery won her third place in the Eureka Prize for science photography, 2008.


This time the birefringence was created by using the light passing through plastic which was manually stressed to enhance the overall effect. When light passes through certain types of material, it experiences two refractive indices, slow and fast wavelengths which creates the rainbow effect.


Ms Putker called her work, "Birefringence Binge"



I'm not sure how 'manually stressed' works, in my case it would be belting it with a geologist's pick.

JEWELLS OR CAKE OR JEWELLS OR CAKE, CHOICES CHOICES CHOICES

I don't know how Antoine managed to stay hidden at the back of the pastry window but that's the way I look when I see a shop full of goodies. I also get that look when I'm contemplating the fridge door, also covered in goodies. Thanks to Annie O'Dyne for the link.

IMPERIAL TOPAZ

Imperial Topaz is in the yellow-orange or reddish-orange (sherry) colour range and has been known since ancient Egypt and Roman times.
The name "Imperial" was given to Topaz in honour of the Emperor Don Pedro of Brazil in order to distinguish it from the heat treated amethyst-turned-citrine known as "golden topaz".
The true Topaz colour is natural and not heated or treated in any way and priced way above that of citrine. When viewed under incandescent light, the orange colour of an Imperial topaz takes on a pinkish hue.



Because of the value, the gem cutters will try to minimize the weight loss as they bring out the natural beauty but this also means that most crystals are a non-standard shape, leading to handcrafted settings instead of mass produced jewellery. The piece of loveliness above is a 7.81 carat stone surrounded by fourteen diamonds in a platinum setting. (drool, want, drool)

And all things lovely come from rough crystals like these.

PRECIOUS TOPAZ

This is a rare example of 'Precious' Topaz as the bi-colour is as it was in the original rough crystal. It is 13.35 carats in weight and measures 27 x 11.8 x 5.42 mm. The yellow pink tone is natural and has not been heat treated. The interior is flawless and it has been cut to enhance the bi-colour.
This exceptional colour is only found near the town of Ouro Preto in the state of Minas Gerais, Brazil.

These faceted stones also come from Ouro Preto.

And the post wouldn't be anything without some bling.

MY MIND IS GOING BY JET PLANE, TRAIN, BUS, ANYTHING THAT WILL TRAVEL

I crawl over in the cold on Monday and storm out in a blaze of sunshine. Don't ask, you already know the usual reasons.

Tuesday was slightly better except it was the wrong day for the movie I wanted to see and in my post-mother hysteria, I really didn't need to watch Wolverine.

This morning was quite mind bending.

The BrickOutHouse went to bed at 3 a.m. and mother went to the bathroom and all the lights were out.
Even her torch wouldn't work.
She only made it back to bed by following the white patch on the cat.
Then the top light wouldn't work.
Then the DVD player came on by itself.
Then the TV came on by itself and turned itself off.
She still couldn't get the torch to work.
The room was pitch dark.
But she could see the street lights weren't working.

The BrickOutHouse was going to work and said goodbye. She told him about the lights.
He went to bed at 8 pm.
His electric clock was still working.
The power didn't go off.
He grabs the phone to tell me this and I tell him to check the torch to see if she has put the batteries in it.
Torch works fine.
Front door slams.

Mother says he doesn't know what he's talking about since he was asleep when the lights went out.

Would you like to hear about the egg exploding in the microwave?

Didn't think so.

Okay, I'll go back to working out what diagenetically related minerals mean or maybe I'll just go back to bed and put my head under the pillows.

I SAID I HAD A ROTTEN SENSE OF HUMOUR

AND SO DOES LORD SEDGWICK

IT'S BEEN A WHILE SINCE I MEMED

A – Age. Young enough not to care who knows it which doesn't mean I'm going to tell you.

B- Bed size A queen size. Room for me, my books, my walkman, notepads, cassettes (there's an age give-away) and the Butler’s tea tray.

C- Chore you hate. Housework, gardening, sex and saving money, breaking in a new Butler.
I couldn't choose one, they're all at the top of the list.

D - Dog’s name. Don't have one now but if I do buy one, its name will be Harold the Elk.
Thank you Lord Hughes.
Memo to self: see if the Butler would go for a name change.

E - Essential start to your day. Apart from sunlight streaming in the window, Earl Grey Tea, black, no sugar, served by the Butler.

F - favorite colour. Mulberry and black. It's the Butler's livery.

G - gold or silver. Yellow gold, not rose gold or white gold.
If you’re going for white gold you might as well go platinum and hang the expense.

H- height. Six foot 2 inches. It’s my meme, I can lie if I want to.

I – instruments. Poker machines.

J – job. Work? That’s what the Butler’s for.

K – kids. I’m allergic to anything under the age of consent.

L - living arrangements. Blissfully alone, except for the Butler.

M - Mum's name. My dad used to call her ‘Angel’.
It’s unprintable what I’ve called her in the last week.

N – Nicknames. Puhleeese, with my height and the Butler trailing behind, no-one would dare.

O - overnight hospital stay other than birth. There’s not enough room on this blog to catalogue. I’ll go with the first one before I was 12 months old. I had a throat infection which obstructed my breathing so the men-in-white carted me off to Fairfield Infectious Diseases Hospital without my mother in attendance. I was kept there for a week, no contact with family until my mother came and got me. She was never told what was wrong with me or what treatment I was given. And you wonder why I love the X-Files. Unfortunately I only found out after Fairfield was closed so now I’ll never know.

P - pet peeve. Comments about my weight. People smoking near me. People drinking too much and being obnoxious. Kids who barf on me. Football players who can’t keep it in their pants. Sam Newman who can’t keep his gob shut. Men who think women are inferior when we actually rule the world, albeit in secret. Creationists. (I would time travel them back to the dinosaurs to try living with them since they’re so convinced)

The list is endless. I’m a grumpy old woman.

Q - Quote from a movie. “We’re gunna need a bigger boat” That statement applies to everything that goes wrong. I love that film.

R - robot or human. With some blokes you can’t tell.
Pardon me while I go check the Butler.

S – Siblings. Sister but then I can’t be certain. I may have been swapped for an alien at Fairfield.

T - time you wake up. After the Butler arrives and before the tea goes cold.

U – underwear. Commando in the house, Bombay bloomers in the street.
I wouldn’t want to frighten the horses if I fell over.

V - Vegetable you dislike. Besides Sam Newman? Okra, chokoes, eggplant and sweet potato.

W- ways you run late. I am never late or the Butler gets fired.

X - X-rays you've had. Too many, I probably glow in the dark.

Y - Yummy food you make. I used to be a great cook but I’ve lost the knack except for a booze laden Christmas cake that can prove lethal. Fortunately the Butler seems to have been trained at the Ritz.

Z - Zoo favourite. I hate zoos except for endangered species but I love otters. I always head for the otters.

NEW THINGS, OLD THINGS

I can't remember if I said about my 30 year old glasses frames, that OPSM weren't all that happy about putting in reading lens and wouldn't guarantee the work and really were a bit snooty about my gold metal oldies.

Well, I bent over to take off my slippers last night and the new supplied and guaranteed frames fell apart and landed at my feet. I haven't had them six months. It only took 5 minutes to put them back together at the store but keep this date in mind in case they fall apart again.

At the movies, I saw the best ad ever but then I have a rotten sense of humour. Big party, bloke turns up with a box wrapped in ribbons. Says to the girl that he knows she's had a rotten time since Freddy (or whoever) went. She puts her hand in the box and squeals, 'Bowling ball!'. Not a bowling ball but Freddy the gerbil encased in a plastic bauble. Okay, I suppose you had to be there but it was funny. I think they were advertising Cadbury's chocolates but I was laughing to hard to remember.

MERCURY IS RETROGRADE

Stupid stars, I hate it when astrologers are right.

Half an hour after I posted on Tuesday, the phone and internet went off. It came back Wednesday morning and went off Wednesday night. It went off this morning but that was the man up the pole fiddling with the wires again. No internet banking then and call for a taxi on the mobile and pass the man fiddling with wires on a pole round the corner and down the street.

Phone and internet is back, for now.

AGL are now giving me grief. NO, we haven't got your PoA yet, it takes a while to come to the call centre. One more call with that remark, which I'll be making tomorrow, and the supervisor will join David in the padded cell. That belongs to the mother problem.

My problem was spelled out in three letters from AGL for the gas and two for the electricity. Apparently, they've been having billing troubles and have just caught up with the accounts. So if I'm having problems paying for this extra large bill, just ring our call centre and we'll come to some arrangement. Lucky me, I have direct debits which went down in each subsequent letter but I'm still in credit. So I'm waiting for any letters like this to arrive at mother's and then watch the mushroom cloud billow over AGL.

It's a good thing I spent yesterday sniffing a fresh can of brass cleaner or I mightn't be as mellow. Sorry Antikva if I sounded a little spaced out but who reads instructions about doing brass cleaning in adequate ventilation. My last brass cleaner wasn't loaded with LSD. But the brass is looking good and I've got 3 more goblets to go and only half a lung left.

I bought mother a duckdown doona for mother's day with her money. So I didn't shop for food, I can forage, but decided to visit today instead of tomorrow. I took off the bed, one heavy wool blanket, one heavy marcella quilt, two mohair rugs, one patchwork quilt and one bedspread and the thermal blanket, she was using that so her leg wouldn't fall out of bed. They weighed a tonne but lacked warmth which is why I put on the light thermal blanket but the control freak decided that was the one thing that was heavy on her legs. Give me strength.

I decided there must be a reason for her not being able to get to the centre of the bed, apart from sheer bloodymindedness because I make her do it, and somewhere along the line an over achieving housekeeper had removed the wooden blocks from the wheels on the bed so it was moving instead of mother.

With a sweep of the broom I found them and put them back. Made the bed with the doona, thermal blanket and mohair rug and made her get in it properly. She ate a custard tart, several painkillers and a cup of tea and passed out for two hours. I think she heard me say goodbye, all I could hear was, "I"m so warm, why didn't we do this before?" Because I still thought I might be able to find the $200 wool filled doona that's still MIA. I love Harris Scarfe, quilt was $90 off, bargain and a half if it shuts her up.

And the rest of the morning was filled with STAR TREK. Trek nerds, don't miss it on the big screen. Brilliant and I don't care if William Shatner was pissed off that he didn't get a guernsey and Nimoy did because he was part of the film and Denny Crane would have ruined it. The story has multi-layers, the special effects are tremendous and the actors were perfect. Love it, love it.

GIVE THE CLAP TO TELSTRA, SORRY, GIVE A CLAP TO TELSTRA

Telephone is fixed, for the moment, for this year, hopefully forever.

The fixit man could have knocked on the door before cutting the phone line with Ma on the other end of the morning hysteria call.

She thought the power went off and couldn't get her breakfast.

That took some explaining, about the difference between electricity and phone line.

It appears that during the 120kmh windstorm, the connection worked loose and water got in and started to short out the line.

But only my phone line.

There's a moral in there somewhere.

BLOG READING IS GOOD FOR MENTAL HEALTH

And on the other hand having no phone or internet since Wednesday night means increased blood pressure, shouting, throwing phones around and moderate to full-on depression.

Telstra call centre must have a large 'be afraid' star against my name by now as I'm treated very gently, WHEN THEY CAN HEAR ME THROUGH THE INSANE NOISE GENERATED BY THEIR PHONE LINE.

It was a dream to have a clear line this morning even with mother on it.

A big thank you to River. I finally got the coffee and vanilla slice, still fresh.

It is depressing to realize that without the internet and blogs, I have no interaction with human beings other than little old ladies in supermarkets and check-out chicks. (No offence River, my check-out chick is lovely).

So pardon my dust as I nick off and catch up with people who have a life.

And you all better be there where I left you. I regard a blog closure as being like a death in the family.

STRESS, A TRUCKLOAD OF STRESS

I blame Lord Sedgwick for goading me into gloating that my troubles were over with AGL while his weren't. HahahahabloodyfarnarklingHa!!!!!!!

Gas account arrives for mother yesterday........$693.
Ring AGL.
Roar at idiot who won't give me details because they don't have a record of my PofA. I sorted this mistake out in February and had the direct debit re-instated, apparently not. In mid rant the wuss hung up on me.

Ring AGL.
Roar again, then ask for supervisor. While I wait, I breathe deeply and think of kitties. I'm reasonably calm when she also tells me I can't have details. After going through records of last supervisor....Hello David, hope you're enjoying the padded cell.....she tells me that there is a record of the direct debits to be re-instated but it hasn't been done. No merde, Sherlock!

There's still no reason for the DD being cut off without authorisation but a lot of reasons for me not to be able to have information without the PofA which they have also no record of.
It cost me $6 to fax through three pages at the post office this morning.

Ring AGL.
Sorry, we can't give you any information because it could take a week for the PofA to come through on the records.
Die, AGL, die painfully, slowly choking on your own red tape.

Stress load number two.
The carer comes to assess mother for showering. Of course she doesn't want to have one right then. Carer demands to know of me, why mother hasn't been showering. Well she couldn't get her out of bed, then so question answered, because the old bat doesn't want to.
She watches mother walk and imediately says her carers can't do the shower in case she falls.
Well isn't that why I'm having professionals come in to do it?
The shower is inspected.
Just take the doors off. Put up a shower curtain. Buy a bench seat where she can slide across without having to step over the rim. Then with MY HELP, the carer shouldn't have any trouble with her falling. MYFARNARKLINGHELP.
Do you see all the 'I's? I have to put up a curtain, I have to buy the seat, I have to be there.
The only good part is that mother's regular house keeper would be available to do the showering.
Mother is happy, she can control the house keeper.
I'm farnarkling under my breath, a lot.

Third stress load. Mother says did I get her message. God knows who she rang but it wasn't me. A man called and he's coming to inspect the smoke alarms. Merde, what??? I ring the maintainence department at Kingston to make sure it's not someone who's trying to get into the house to sell her something. Yes, he is booked in for an inspection. Who booked him in? The temporary housekeeper of last week who did farnarkling all but dust cobwebs and take orders from mother who sent her up to buy a new mop which she didn't use because no one could find the bucket and no one thought to buy another. Where was I? Maintainence man was cancelled because stupid woman, after finding the old smoke alarm on the kitchen table didn't think to look for the brand new one on the wall. And no, why would anyone actually throw out a broken smoke alarm before 12 months were up.

The mystery of the wool doona was solved. She doesn't remember ever having one. She doesn't remember the thermal blanket I crawled into the wardrobe to grab from the far reaches of that black hole. When I asked why there were three bottles of Palmolive washing up detergent in the bathroom vanity, she says the BrickOutHouse washes his hair in it. Why are there 3 cans of airwick anti-bacterial? She's never seen them. What is in the box marked medications? She's never seen that before. In other words BAD MAN DID IT AND RAN AWAY. This was after I washed the towells and her clothes which she'd put in a plastic garbage bag instead of the washing basket because she couldn't find one. There are six washing baskets in the house. I found them all, fought the bad man for them and brought them back. I replaced the light bulb in the lounge. She says I'm good at that, do I carry around spares all the time?

And I got rained on.

FRIZIONS

Peter Wasilewski studies the magnetic properties of meteorites and rock from the moon and Earth. He's also an artist who creates images called Frizions, using polarised light and ice.
He takes a petri dish of ice in the process of freezing and sandwiches it between two polarising filters. As white light passes through the first filter it polarises, causing the rays to vibrate in the same plane.


Ice crystals split light into two rays which travel at different velocities through the ice in a phenomenon known as birefringence. When the rays are recombined at the second polarising filter there is a phase difference causing the interference needed to create these colours.

The colours are determined by the thickness and lattice structure of the ice. Varying the thickness will produce a variety of patterns.

Although water ice can be found throughout the solar system, the lattice structures vary due to the differing temperatures and pressures of their formation.

Only the ice found on Earth has the correct structure to produce a frizion.

See here for more of Wasilewski's images.

HELL'S BELLS

After waiting weeks for nephew to come and put new light globes in the ceiling, I decided to do it myself. Smoke alarm is still sitting on the floor, I'm not that good.

Choosing a light bulb is like choosing a toothbrush or toothpaste, too much choice.

So I remembered to change the old wattage into the new wattage, remembered the screw in type but who thought about bloody colour.

I am now sitting in the middle of Stalag Luft 17.

Never buy a 100w clear daylight bulb.

The lamps are going back on.

THIS IS A TOLLIDAY

I love the ships, love the minerals, love the shape, love the little hoists going up from the harbour quay on both sides of the rock mountain.

BREATHE IN SLOWLY, THINK OF CATS

She spoke of Egypt, and a white

Temple, against night

She smiled with clicking teeth

and said

That the dead were never dead;

Said old emperors hung like bats..........

But empresses come back as cats!

William Rose Benet

AHOY ME HEARTIES, THERE BE TREASURE

That's a fine haul there but only a fraction of what has been recovered from the wreck of the Whydah. It's the only authentic pirate treasure found in the only documented pirate ship ever found. Evidence being the recovery of the ship's bell with the inscription, The Whydah Galley 1716.

The Captain of the Whydah was the l8th Century pirate Black Sam Bellamy, who was returning to collect his bride or visit his mistress according to who's telling the tale, when the ship was caught in a storm off Cape Cod and went ashore at Wellfleet, Massachusetts.

Underwater explorer Barry Clifford, a marine salvager on Martha's Vineyard and honorary member of the Boston Marine Society (the oldest association of sea captains in the world), discovered the remains of the wreck off Marconi Beach in 1984. He has been on expeditions to Madagascar where he and his team excavated several sites. One shipwreck might be the Adventure Galley, flagship of Captain Kidd. Another is believed to be the Fiery Dragon, once commanded by the pirate, William Condon.

One of the original members of the Whydah search team was John F. Kennedy Jnr. Two years ago, divers discovered his compass, inscribed with his initials, hanging from some wrecked cannons. Kennedy was with Clifford the day they picked up a signal from the seabed where they suspected the Whydah would be.

The importance of the Whydah in marine archeaology is in the range of artifacts found from all over the world. The ship was carrying the cargo of all the ships Bellamy had captured. Rare coins going back to Ferdinand & Isabella, silver pieces of eight and a pewter plate which has a sign etched on the rim which is thought to be one of the oldest authentic Freemasons' symbols known. Along with cannons, plates, silk stockings, there was found a pistol with a dragon engraved on the golden handle. The excavation is still going with the team hoping to find more treasure at the bottom of the wreck where the cannons crashed through the decks when the ship capsized.

You can see a video of the treasure or visit the home page.

NOT A TOLLIDAY!

It's by the jewellery firm of Buccellati. It's over the top, revolting and I'd rather have a fairy castle any time. Feel free to leave your usual well-informed comments on this lovely piece (upchuck) and don't spare the superlatives.

SNOW BALES

These are snow bales formed in a few hours on the prairies of Southern Idaho and photographed by Tim Tevebaugh.

They're about 2 feet high and are a naturally occurring phenomenon requiring the right combination of temperature, humidity, wind speed, snow and flat or slight rolling open ground covered with a smooth layer of ice or crusty snow.

When the air temperature is slightly above freezing, with drifting snow and strong gusty winds of at least 25 mph the the bales begin to form by the wind rolling a bit of snow which clings because it's wet but rolls because the surface is icy.

The wind moves the snow continuously, picking up more snow as it rolls until it becomes too heavy for the wind to move or it comes up against an obstacle. They're very fragile, disintegrating if the temperature varies a degree up or down.

RANDOM THOUGHTS

I watched 'Mad Men' on SBS last week to see if it lived up to the hype but I couldn't judge by one episode. What did shock me was the cigarette smoking. In the bars, workplace, home, everywhere and by everybody and why was I shocked, because I remember that. I'm so used to not seeing a smokey haze everywhere I go that I realize how far we've come in not tolerating a habit that's harmful to those who don't indulge. It also vividly reminded me of being kissed by a man who'd been drinking whisky and smoking all night. It was so vivid, I could taste and smell it by memory. Revolting. Perhaps one day, we'll have the same revulsion to drunken morons walking the streets.

I watched 'Hot Fuzz' last night. I think only the British could make a black comedy that ends up with so much gunplay and mayhem but was still funny. A lot of it was due to the editing in the cutting room. Also enjoyable was a film with a small amount of swearing instead of the writers being paid by the amount of 'f' words per minute.

I've been out in the garden again and it's not getting any better. The last of the bluestones are in place, never to be moved again, ever. I'm still getting the beds ready for all the faffing about before I plant although I have put the plants there in pots just to make it look like I'm a gardner. I did stuff the Jade Plant straight in with a bit of potting mix. It's an experiment, just to see what a survivor it is.

Now gardners out there, advice. My Camelia's leaves are turning yellow. Does it have too much water, not enough water, does it need food, should I talk to it, should I sing a gardening song? Help needed here.
Freesia bulbs. Which end is up? Pointy end or round end? I once lost a whole bag of mixed bulbs once because I didn't read the label and the damn things had to be planted all different ways. Goddess, I'd rather be inside cleaning the silver. I rock at cleaning silver, absolutely crap at gardening.

And what about the Mother, I hear you ask. As much as I try to be compassionate and ignore the gibes, it's getting more difficult. She rang my sister last week, sobbing, 'Come and talk to me. I have no-one'. She'd just had me but I'd slammed the phone down, sister followed suit. Aunt Patty turned up yesterday and wouldn't look at my sister or speak to her. Mother hardly mentioned her today. Bad sign. It means she's been bagging us again. She rattled on about the lovely young man next door who fixed the bathroom lights after I'd bought them and the new starters. BrickOutHouse took him in a 6-pack as a thank-you. When I mentioned this, she dismissed him and once again started on how lovely the neighbours are to her.
She loves the new heater and it was my fault it didn't work, I hadn't turned it on. Bullshit, I couldn't get the pins into the old plug and tried it on another powerpoint and it worked. BrickOutHouse fixed the plug, he has stronger hands.

The doctor's coming next week and I won't be there and she can fumble around in her own mind for her details. I'm seeing him the next day, that'll be interesting.

CASTLE LIZZADRO

Another of William Tolliday's masterpieces. He created this castle in 1984 as a memorial to James "Chris" Lizzadro, a grandson of the founder of the Lizzadro Museum of Lapidary Art .

On a large slab of Brazilian agate, the 18ct gold castle rises from specimens of amethyst, malachite, azurite and vanadium. His signature diamonds are set as windows. The sculpture in in the museum rotates slowly to music and at the push of a button, the sound of preparations for battle are heard.

WILLIAM TOLLIDAY, MASTER GOLDSMITH

This is William Tolliday working on one of his fairytale castles. He was born in 1915 and worked his entire career at Garrard & Co., London. In the late 1960s he began creating his fairytale castle of gold, sitting in, on and around the most beautiful mineral specimens.
He said he inspired by the look of the Houses of Parliament and the buildings of Venice with the golden light of sunset behind them.
He first paints a water colour of his design then selects a foundation mineral base to suit the 18ct golden towers and bridges he constructs piece by tiny piece. He blended red, yellow, soft white and oxidised white gold to develop depth and perspective.
The reflective properties of the minderals change the light of the gold as the towers are added and soldered into place.
He used diamonds for windows which gave a life-like flash in the high towers.
Everything is in miniature ith amazing detail from the flags flying on the turrets, the rigging on the ships or the tiny trees hidden in the crystals.
He signed each piece with his name as a fine sprinkling of gold dust.
As it takes, on average, 12 months to execute the planned sculpture, only three or four are completed each year from the first water colour sketch.
Below is the first version of Neuschwanstein Castle, Bavaria, made in 1969. It's crafted of 18ct and 22ct red, yellow and white gold. The courtyard is made of the mineral barite. The natural rock base is formed of tourmaline and lepidolite minerals. Several of the turret windows of the three towers are set with baguette diamonds. It measure 6 5/8 inches by 5 1/4 inches in width.
It has no flat base and the gold battlements seem to perch precariously on top of the specimen instead of blending into the rocks.

This 1980s version of the Royal Castle Neuschswantein has the golden towers fully part of the amethyst geode on which it sits. Once again, there are diamond insets in the windows and the agate base balances the whole structure. Nestled inside the geode are tiny golden fir trees.

The whole sculpture is 23 cms tall.

MONDAY

Just when I thought I had a handle on my fraying nerves, I have my mother and ex daughter-in-law on the same day and in the same room.

Pardon me while I slip into the next room and find a bigger bag and a lot more panic pills.

Ahhh, that's better and just so you lot know that I'm dealing with crazy here, really crazy.

She wanted her bed re-made because she didn't like the bed-making girl last Wednesday.

Mutter, swear, mutter and I'm in the wardrobe looking for a pillowcase and the wool doona which has mysteriously disappeared but that's a whole 'nother crazy. I pick up a pillowcase and it was heavy and dropped on my foot. So inside the pillowcase is a towell, wrapped in another towell which is wrapped around a 14 inch ceramic plate. By now, with the hurting foot and all, I'm not muttering I'm swearing loudly.

I'm trying to imagine what could be wrapped and hidden in a single bed woollen doona.

I'm going to need a bigger bag and a lot more pills.

EGG SUNDAY AND I HAZ THREE

And I'm too tired to eat them.
I spent the day moving bluestones and believe me, I'm all blue-stoned out.
I will be so sore tomorrow I don't want to think about it.
So now I have three small garden plots instead of one long weed-infested bed.
I suppose there's something I have to do with the dry sand, like mulch or organic goodness that must be dug in before I can plant.
I'll think about it tomorrow, tomorrow is another day.

It's been a craptacular week. I have not had a nervous attack like this for twenty years. It's like the 'Clayton's heart attack', the one you only think you're having. If I was going to have one, it would have been today lugging around bluestones. Insomnia, heart beating so fast it felt like trying to jump out of my chest, nausea, dizziness and not wanting to eat. I knew I was bad but not wanting to eat.

This was a mother induced panic attack of monumental proportions. Easily fixed after I worked it out. Up the little green panic pills, place paper bag over head for hyperventilating and an hour later things were calming down. I still have the shakes but I also have chocolate eggs, I just don't feel like eating them.

I can't believe it took me a week to work out what was wrong and get back on track. I can't believe I didn't blog for a week either. I didn't even turn on the computer for three days, in fact I don't think I did anything except look at the inside of a paper bag and pop pills.

I'm feeling better now, mentally. Physically, some one has stolen all my leg muscles and replaced them with foam rubber.

IT'S RAINING IN MELBOURNE!

But the rain held off yesterday for the Sills Bend afternoon wedding.

Unfortunately it didn't hold off today and I was forced to abandon the gardening.
I moved two bluestones, potted 15 cuttings and half grubbed out the rotting stump of the walnut tree.
I hate gardening. There are crawling things in the dirt.

Weeds spring up like weeds. I went to all the trouble of putting down newspaper and mulch under the lime tree which is supposed to stop weeds but there's a fine crop just waiting to be pulled up....again.

My triumph is that the lemon geranium I filched from somebody's garden is flourishing.

My defeat was trying to dig a hole to put it in. I can't dig the spade into the ground so out with the bread knife to cut a square in the grass and see if that works. That's the thing with gardens, they expect you to go knee down and worship. Not with my knees.

Bluestones are a lot heavier than they were 8 years ago or my heart attack threshold is getting lower.

Keep raining Melbourne.

THE TASMAN FRACTURE

Enlarge the map for a good view of the Tasman Fracture around the coasts of Victoria and Tasmania. This fracture is a trench that drops nearly 3 miles below the surface of the Southern Ocean. Up to now, it has only been explored to a depth of 5,900 feet but with the aid of the remotely operated vehicle Jason from the research vessel Thomas G. Thompson, researchers were able to see images down to 13,000 feet. The ship mapped the region, which has not been touched by fishing trawlers, during December 2008 and January 2009.


Jason captured images that showed this l.6 foot tall carnivorous sea squirt which uses its funnel-shaped head to capture prey in the same way that a Venus Fly Trap plant does.

And this newly discovered soft coral called a gorgon's head. (which looks rather like the love child of a witch and an archaeologist)

A RETURN VISIT

It's the Great Blue Hole on Lighthouse Reef Atoll off the coast of Belize and I've blogged about it here in one of my first posts. The image was taken by the Advanced Land Imager (ALI) on NASA's Earth Observing-1 satellite on March 24, 2009. It's one of the most popular and dangerous dive sites in the Carribbean. It's almost 1000 feet across and 400 feet deep and was once above ground during the ice age when stalactites formed inside the cave.

I still wouldn't go there. Deep dark water terrifies me. My past life catching up with me as I went down on the Titanic and tomorrow is the 97th anniversary of the big boat setting off from Southampton on its maiden voyage. Southampton is building a museum to be opened in 2012 (providing the Mayan Calendar is wrong about the "we're all going to die" prophecy) for the centenary of the collision with the iceberg. They plan to reconstruct part of the liner, a walk down memory lane without the ice.

I might be the only person in the world who loves the theme song from the film and you're all lucky I can't Youtube it. Even through Celine's mangled English, the words are great

(shut up, for me they are) but don't watch the movie in winter, you'll freeze your buns off.

MOUNT REDOUBT 1989/90

This was Mount Redoubt's last big eruption.

This was also me, yesterday.

Is it psychologically sound to know one is half an inch from a complete mental breakdown?

CHOICES, CHOICES

I'm forced to get another set of steps instead of going up that stupid ladder. A dozen times today just to wash the curtains, well it has been mmm...mumble...mumble...two years since I had them down. They're 30 years old and fragile, too much washing takes away the holding power.

The operating procedure is to mark where the holes have appeared then cut that whole width out and pray that the upteen metres left don't shred in the washing machine. I was lucky, one tear and a small patch of shreddy bits that got a lace flower glued on to hold it all together. I think maybe another 12 months should see them out.

The thing was, the ladder. It's now making me very nervous to go higher than a foot off the ground. My knees are shouting abuse at me. Before the ladder, I had to move two tvs and a cupboard. My back is joining in with the knees. So, it's off to Bunnings for a two-step step and they cost $30 and I need an outside ladder as well, $60. I sat down and counted the ladder fund of 5c and 10c pieces, $13, running a bit short there. The Harry Potter fund has $21, not touching that.
The running away from home fund which I counted first after this morning's vicious, vitriolic, bitching Mother phone call, has zero. $15 in the Avon teapot but I really need that mascara, not touching that.

I think I'll steal it from Mother. I've just found that four of the Royal Albert 'Country Roses' mugs have disappeared from the glass Armoire, given to someone more deserving than I apparently. I bought those for her, they're mine, damn it and they were $50 each, way back then. I must have been flush because I bought six and I must have liked her or I'd have kept them. So I'll just be borrowing against my expectations.